10 tips to better fit the criticisms
We all receive criticism from time to time. Sometimes they may not be true, but at other times they can help us to ask ourselves what we are doing wrong. It is not the same as criticizing us in the face and explaining the reasons for criticism, to do it in a public place in front of other people and without explaining what they consider that we have done wrong. But what to do in those situations where they make us look ridiculous? Do we do as if we have not heard? Do we get angry and let the situation get out of hand?
You may not be able to prevent someone from criticizing you, but what you can do is change the way you perceive criticism. When you find yourself in this situation, we invite you to try these 10 tips to better fit the criticisms . I'm sure you'll appreciate it!
1. Evaluate criticism and the person who makes them
It is important to be objective in order to know how to respond and act. There is a big difference between constructive criticism and criticism from someone who only wants to hurt you to discredit you. Thus, evaluate if what that person says is true .
What to do: Try to get away from the situation and lower your ego, just as if the situation were happening to someone else and not to you. Breathe deeply and do not let yourself be carried away by anger.
2. Recognize your emotions
The moment pressure can dominate you if you are not able to recognize your emotions or what bothers you about the criticism. When someone hurts you, especially someone close to you, it is still better to let it go to avoid unnecessary confrontation. But it is important that you recognize those emotions because they can tell you that something is not right. If you do not pay attention to your emotions, the problem may be greater and even eternal. Recognize the message they send you is the principle to be able to deal with problems properly.
What to do: Before letting yourself be driven by impulse, pay attention to what your emotions are trying to tell you. Ask yourself: If this emotion could speak now, what would it say? What would I do? Or ... What can I do to get out of this situation in a relaxed way?
3. Set clear limits to the usual critics
You can decide who and what you tolerate in your life. Because both in your personal life and in the workplace you can meet people who criticize you, but you decide the limits that you put on that person and how you are going to feel about what he says about you . It's good for your well-being that you get away from this kind of toxic people, because it can affect you emotionally. At work can have a negative impact on your performance, your creativity and can harm the good working environment.
What to do: Decide what you are going to do if the critic follows the criticism. Try to send him, calmly and delicately, that you are not willing to tolerate this situation. For example, you can tell him that you are going to let him pass this time, but as it happens again, the relationship with that person will end. When you give to understand where the limit is, you make yourself respect. Make sure you take the action if it happens again.
4. Find the hidden truth
Nearby people, co-workers or someone in the supermarket queue they can respond to our actions, and their behaviors can reflect our own words . Their criticism, although harsh or spiteful, may hide some aspect of our own behavior that we have refused to see, but that may be true. For a criticism to be constructive, look for that hidden truth, although it is not always easy to accept it.
What to do: Instead of reacting with anger to criticism, have the courage to ask yourself: Does this criticism have any truth? Then ask again or ask the other person if there is something you can do so they do not feel offended.
5. Do not let them tell lies about you
When someone spreads rumors or lies that may affect your work or your relationships, you can not ignore it. In these cases it is better to face the problem with your head to clear your name .
What to do: To have a clear mind, take a few deep breaths and take a piece of paper. On one side, write the rumor or the lie. On the other side, write the lie as you see it. Stay with those people who may have misinterpreted your actions or words and calmly explain how you feel and what really happened. Even if they do not believe you, at least you have been able to defend yourself, so you can continue with your life.
6. Solve problems from the heart
If you speak from the heart and honestly, it is much better than reacting in an impulsive and spiteful way. Acting like this makes you a great person, and does not allow the situation to get worse
What to do: In difficult situations reconnect with yourself and your heart.Just close your eyes and breathe. Think of something nice or something to be deeply grateful for. Once the anger is over, go back to the problem and ask yourself: What can I do to resolve this situation? What is my next step? Listen to the answers that come from your heart.
7. Follow your path
When an insult from someone immature comes to you, instead of having the role of victim, go your way. Do not let criticisms distract you from your goals . Think of those comments as simple noise.
What to do: Do not let harmful criticism affect you, and do not let all the critics leave you out of the game. Not every criticism demands an answer. Stay focused on keeping important things in your life so you can continue to give much to others.
8. Open your heart to critics
Sometimes what affects you is not your fault. Maybe the person who criticizes you has a self-esteem problem or is going through a bad time . On these occasions, it may be the way they have to say they need help. For example, your roommate may be having a bad time with your partner and criticize you for not picking up the dishes. In this case, you may be targeted because you are a person close to him, but what really happens is that he is not able to manage so much emotional pain. Put his hand on him instead of fighting him.
What to do: When you detect that this may be the problem, ask him what happens to him. You can also tell him that you know what is going wrong and that this is affecting your relationship.
9. Be courteous but firm in public
Humiliation, whether by a boss or co-worker in a meeting, or by a family member, can be embarrassing and uncomfortable. Do not criticize the critics or fight with them . This will only hurt you. Be polite, be calm and control your impulses.
What to do: If someone has legitimate reasons but has verbalized them in the wrong way, smile and say something to break the tension and also add: "If there is something that has bothered you, I would like to talk to you later".
10. Do not take it personally
If you have listened to the previous advice and have adjusted your behavior but continue to criticize you, it is time to move on. Unfortunately, some people criticize to project their own problems on others . Therefore, do not take it personally.
What to do: Instead of wasting your energy and attention on critical comments, get rid of them, accept them, let them go, and move on with your life.
