12 tips to overcome emotional dependence
When your happiness depends on other people, then you are an emotionally dependent person . This problematic situation causes you to feel addicted to your partner despite the fact that things between you are not going well.
And although you already know that you are not well in your relationship for a long time, you do not have the strength to take a step forward because of the fear of uncertainty or not trusting yourself when dealing with situations that may appear In your day to day. You are afraid of being alone, and you prefer to stay there knowing that you are not happy.
If you feel identified with this and you think it would be good to get out of this situation, in this article you can see some keys and tips to become an emotionally independent person .
How to get out of this painful situation
Although men often hide this problem out of embarrassment to recognize and express that they are emotionally dependent on another person, this phenomenon affects both sexes equally.
Emotional dependence causes great suffering because who experiences it thinks that he is unable to live without the other person , and it happens when it has a low self-esteem or mistaken beliefs of what a relationship should be. It is a type of immature love that has no future. It takes courage and courage to learn to overcome emotional dependence, but it is worth doing so that you are finally able to take control of your own life.
- If you want to know what a healthy love is like, you can read our article: "Mature love: why is the second love better than the first?"
Tips to overcome emotional dependence
If you want to overcome emotional dependence and become a person with greater autonomy and independence, you can follow the advice you will find below:
1. Be honest with yourself and recognize that there is a problem
One of the most complicated things to do when someone is in this situation is to reflect deeply on what is happening. It's easier to look the other way or blame other people than look inside and recognize that we have a problem.
Taking time for self-observation and sincerely recognizing that there is a problem is the principle to be able to take a step forward and end emotional dependence.
2. Do not be afraid of uncertainty
And it is that, many times, it is the fear of being alone that makes us return and return to that toxic relationship that causes us so much pain and suffering. When we feel that the future alone is uncertain, we prefer to stay there, in the place we already know. Therefore, it is necessary leave the comfort zone and adopt a positive attitude towards change.
3. Learn to say "no"
Learning to be assertive is essential to enjoy the emotional balance necessary to enjoy greater well-being. Being assertive means saying what you think respecting the other person with whom you interact. That is to say, it's about respecting the other party, but it also means respecting oneself . Learning to say "no" is essential to recover emotional autonomy.
4. Work on yourself
The main problem of people who are emotionally dependent is that they are too aware of the other person and forget who they are. One must pursue their goals, have their hobbies and work in Grow every day a little like being human or, in other words, self-realization. To stop being an emotionally dependent person, one of the keys is to fight for one's personal development.
5. And ... reinforce your self-esteem
Working in oneself is the first step to strengthen one's self-esteem, which, as has already been said, is one of the main causes for which an individual is in this situation. Further, The longer you are in this toxic relationship, the more you suffer the consequences in terms of self-esteem .
That is why it is necessary to develop strategies that help improve self-esteem. I recommend our article: "10 keys to increase your self-esteem in 30 days" to be able to work on the value you have of yourself.
6. Check your beliefs
Another of the main reasons why someone can end up in a situation of emotional dependence are the beliefs that one has about what love is and what a relationship should be like.
To avoid this, it is necessary question their own beliefs and have a critical thinking about these . In movies, love may seem very beautiful, but the reality is different. Do not force yourself to be in a couple for fear of being alone or because of the need to have a partner and get married.
You can enjoy great satisfaction and wellbeing when you are single. You can check it in this article: "Is it possible to be single and be happy? The 8 benefits of not having a partner. "
7. Connect with other people
It can also happen that the emotionally dependent person has a poor social life, few friends or feels isolated. This causes a complicated situation, because the person has no one to talk to and explain what happens to them. Also, have an active social life makes us enjoy much healthier relationships and do not depend so much on one person.
8. Be brave
To get out of this situation it is necessary to take responsibility, because you can choose between staying there and taking a step forward to end the problem. You have to be brave and not fear the future. For it, there's nothing like setting short-term goals and being very clear from the start . The changes require a period of adaptation, and over time you will not regret having made the decision to leave behind this toxic relationship.
9. Resist the temptation to go back
Obviously, there will be easier moments and more difficult moments to take a step forward. But you should know that the change is never easy and that there may be ups and downs along the way. Understanding this can make you aware that you must resist the temptation to go back.
10. Learn to love in a healthy way
To begin to cleanse our relationship we must love in a healthy way and leave behind many limiting beliefs that we have incorporated and that prevent us from enjoying relationships in their fullness . As experts in personal development say, it is a very heavy backpack. Moving from emotional dependence to affective autonomy is one of the keys to achieving well-being as a couple, and for this, it is necessary to love in a mature way.
- Related article: "Goodbye emotional dependence; hi affective autonomy "
11. Avoid other people's expectations
It is likely that many of the emotionally dependent people have unrealistic and overly intense expectations about what they can expect from others. This usually leads to an idealization towards the other party , and it is not a wise decision to fill the gap we can feel with ourselves with the need to have someone by our side at all costs.
Living with this illusory image of another person can be dangerous, because even in the face of the evidence that the expectations we have are not true, these expectations can keep us clinging to something imaginary, to an unreal image of what the other person is. Realizing this can help overcome emotional dependence.
12. Seek professional help
In some cases, these tips can help you overcome this situation and realize what the problem is. Being aware that you are emotionally dependent, recognizing that you are afraid of being alone and working to grow and develop as a person, are strategies that will help you improve your well-being and empower yourself in the face of life and uncertainty.
However, getting out of this dark place, the toxic relationship, is not always easy. The best way to achieve this is by seeking professional help , because a psychologist can help you acquire tools to improve your self-esteem, your interpersonal skills and, therefore, your well-being.
