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Assertive people: 10 characteristics they have in common

Assertive people: 10 characteristics they have in common

December 5, 2021

The assertiveness It is a key communication style in many aspects. Being assertive means that express your opinion correctly and defend your point of view, while also respecting the rights of others . Therefore, it is necessary to communicate efficiently with other individuals, but also for our own emotional well-being.

It benefits us because it can increase our self-esteem, make us earn the respect of other people and can even help us prevent and reduce stress. Luckily, you can learn to be assertive and, therefore, in today's article we explain what characterizes assertive people.

Assertiveness: 3 main areas

And is that not everyone communicates assertively, which can lead to interpersonal conflicts that, in many cases, could be avoided. Assertiveness, moreover, it is an attitude that manifests itself in how we assert ourselves and in how we defend our rights , that is, in the expression of our feelings, needs, preferences and opinions. Always taking into account the opinion of the other person, respecting it and valuing it.


In summary, There are three basic pillars of assertiveness : the Self-affirmation, the expression of positive feelings (praise, liking, etc.) and the expression of negative feelings (manifestation of disagreement or displeasure) in an appropriate and respectful manner.

Characteristics of assertive people

What characterizes assertive people? The following 10 traits are characteristic of assertive people. Do you dare to know them?

1. They have confidence in themselves

Assertive people trust themselves and are not afraid to show themselves this way. In contrast, unsafe people often put on a shell and be defensive. In addition, people who are not assertive will let other people decide for them, because they have serious difficulties to show their point of view and say "no."


2. Respect the opinion of others

And since these kinds of people feel confident, t They are also able to accept the opinions and beliefs of others . That does not mean that they share them, they simply know that everyone has their own opinion.

3. Validate the emotions of others

Emotional validation is a process of learning, understanding and expressing acceptance of the emotional experience of another individual. It's key because improves interpersonal relationships, because the other individual feels understood about what he feels and favors the verbalization of what he thinks. Assertive people are experts when validating emotionally to others, which causes an increase in trust between the two actors in the relationship.

You can learn more about emotional validation in our article: "Emotional validation: 6 basic tips to improve it"

4. Actively listen

Assertive individuals listen, they really listen . Not only that, but they listen actively. What does that mean? Well, they pay attention not only to what the other person says, but what they feel and what they express emotionally. This is achieved with a correct eye contact, without interrupting the other people and emotionally validating the other interlocutor to confirm that they have received the verbal and non-verbal information correctly.


Recommended article: "Active listening: the key to communicating with others"

5. They know themselves

Assertive people know themselves and know the path they follow in life . They are conscious people who have a great self-knowledge. They understand their emotions so they do not fear them.

6. They are unconditionally accepted

One of the keys to self-confidence is that they do not think about what others think of them. That happens because they are accepted as they are and, therefore, they open up to others without expecting anything in return. They have great inner strength, and this allows them to be more successful in their lives.

7. They choose their friends

This type of people usually choose who will accompany them on their journey through life . At least, as far as possible, they stay away from toxic people because they allow those who really deserve to be their friends to enter their lives.

8. They know their limitations but they fight with all their might

Besides accepting unconditionally, they also accept their limitations . Now, these people struggle with all their strength to realize their desires, because they are true to their ideals. This makes them committed people. In order to accept others, you must first accept yourself.

9. They know how to regulate their emotions

Knowing how to regulate emotions and have great emotional control is a determining factor when relating to others. And the assertive people know how to properly understand and manage their feelings and those of others ... This lets them know what the other person needs, and adapt their tone and message to the circumstances.

10. Confront conflicts serenely

So, this helps them face conflicts with other individuals calmly . They do not experience more anxiety than when they relate to others and are able to cope calmly with conflicts. Not only that, but they also learn from failures or successes because they know they are part of life.


How to Spot the 9 Traits of Borderline Personality Disorder (December 2021).


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