Emotional pain: what it is and how to manage it
Feeling pain is something that nobody likes, being something unpleasant in spite of having an origin and an evolutionarily adaptive function. Probably when we think of pain we do it in a physical pain, in wounds or illnesses.
But there is also another type of pain, which we have all felt at some time and that generates great suffering: the emotional pain that our experiences can cause us or the lack of these . It is about this last type of pain that we are going to talk about throughout this article.
- Related article: "The 8 types of emotions (classification and description)"
Emotional pain: what is it and what are its causes?
Although it is not something unknown to anyone, we call emotional pain to all that feeling of suffering or suffering generated psychic level without mediating its appearance a physical reason. The causes of emotional pain are purely mental, and usually refer to the experience of some kind of aversive experience (being therefore its generally environmental origin).
There is a practically unlimited number of situations that can generate this discomfort. Some examples that usually generate this type of pain are love breakups and disappointments , the fights and serious conflicts with loved ones, the loss of abilities, the appearance of a serious, chronic or even terminal illness or the death of people we love.
As with physical pain, emotional pain is to some extent functional and adaptive: it allows us to avoid painful situations or seek protection from aversive events. But nevertheless it stops being it when it becomes a suffering prolonged in time or permanent or exceeds personal capabilities and / or resources.
- Perhaps you are interested: "Depression Discomfort Theory: What it is, and how it explains this disorder"
It can generate physical alterations
Emotional pain is a type of suffering that is suffered psychically, not appearing in the presence of a medical disease (or at least not as a direct effect of the disease) or a damaged or damaged tissue or organ. However, the truth is that emotional pain and physical pain are linked, and the first can cause an affectation at physiological level: we may somatize our emotional suffering .
To somatize is to express through the body the discomfort of the suffering originated at the psychological level, and symptomatology may appear in the form of pain experienced as physical in different parts of the body. This pain does not have an organic cause, or if there is any real illness this is not the cause of the pain or it should not be as intense as the one experienced. Of course, the pain it's not unreal or faked if not that is actually perceived.
Some of the different discomforts that the emotional pain can cause is the presence of back pains, vomiting and diarrhea, febrile episodes, headaches and dizziness. Gastric problems or sexual dysfunctions such as erectile dysfunction or loss of libido may also appear. In very extreme cases it could even cause blockages in basic functions such as speech or movement, and even lose sensitivity of some limb.
Manage emotional pain
The emotional pain and the suffering that it generates are, as we have said, adaptive at first. We must allow ourselves to feel it, and not avoid it or hide it, valuing it as something that can be very natural in response to a given situation. If someone who is loved dies or decides to cease their relationship with us, it is logical and normal to have a high level of suffering, a sad mood and decrease energy levels and the desire to do things. However, the passage of time and the arrival of new experiences will contribute to the gradual management of our pain and let's go forward, surpassing it .
It will be when we can not manage it, limit our lives to a large extent or we are unable to adapt to the new situation in which some type of action will be necessary or resort to some kind of professional help.
The first thing is recognize the existence of emotional pain , validate it and take into account that each painful experience is a more or less prolonged process to overcome. It will also be necessary to identify the emotions that generate the suffering and the events that caused them, in case they are not already known.
After that, we must allow these to be expressed and flow, trying to learn to modify them or even introduce experiences that generate emotions incompatible with suffering. The search for alternatives and solutions to the reasons for suffering, or the experimentation of new experiences , can be of great help in the face of overcoming pain.
A very important aspect to take into account in case of somatization: although it is possible to work and even successfully treat the physical symptoms derived, a full recovery will not be possible unless the cause of the emotional pain is treated, since it will probably reappear.
