yes, therapy helps!
How do psychologically mature people act? 10 keys

How do psychologically mature people act? 10 keys

March 31, 2024

The expression "being an immature" is a label that is used in a very usual way to describe those people who, in some of their vital areas, do not develop in a coherent, competent or stable way. Although this type of personal functioning is maladaptive, it does not exist as a specific category in the current classification system for mental disorders, the DSM-V. However, this behavioral and attitudinal style can be presented in an underlying way as a common element in various personality disorders.

Yes, in the same way that we can speak, using everyday language, of immature people, it is also possible to talk about psychologically mature people . Let's see what characterizes them.


  • Related article: "The 9 stages of the life of human beings"

The mature personality style

For the psychiatrist and expert Enrique Rojas (2001) there are three areas to which the so-called state of personal maturity can be circumscribed: the affective, the intellectual and the professional. In terms of the author, maturity is a state of knowledge and good judgment, prudence and knowledge , that has been achieved and that leads to positively manage one's own psychology. In this way, a person who is in that state has an adequate level of ability to conduct their life in a competent and effective emotional level.

A key aspect is to understand this construct as a dynamic process, a phenomenon that does not have a specific purpose or destination, but that is constantly and permanently modulated throughout the life cycle. Therefore, the idea that there is a perfect and ideal degree of personal maturity to which to arrive and maintain in a static way must be banished.


Neuroanatomical keys of psychological maturity

When reference is made to the neuroanatomical development of different structures and connections that make up the human brain , infinity of investigations have demonstrated how the areas of the frontal lobes have a central role in the behavior linked to the decision making, to the capacity to plan future events, to the flexibility when carrying out complex reasoning in the resolution of problems and improvise and adopt adaptive or flexible behavior, etc.

These competences seem very much linked to the definition that has been indicated above of what a mature personal style implies; they are the skills that give the human being such a category and differentiates it from other less intellectually developed animal species.

Scientific studies have determined that these frontal areas they do not reach their full development until well into the third decade of life , approximately at 25 years old. In addition, the studies that have substantiated the knowledge that today is held about the concept of emotional intelligence, also closely linked to the question of personal maturity, affirm how the neuronal circuitry established between the frontal lobe and the structures of the system is determinant. limbic, whose function is the regulation of emotional states.


Broadly speaking, it can be said that the latter is in charge of controlling the most instinctive physiological responses of stress, anger or fear and intervenes in motivational processes and in the learning of more complex behaviors and made based on past experiences. On the other hand, the orbitofrontal zone modulates the feelings analytically and gives the orders on how to behave behaviorally when the information of the limbic system is received as the individual is experiencing a certain emotional state. Failures in the connections between both areas cause unthinking, disproportionate and socially mismatched responses.

A classic example that explains this phenomenon is found in the literature that founded the development of neuroscience as such: the case of Phineas Gage (1948), a foreman who worked in the construction of railways and who suffered serious alterations in personality after a impressive accident in which a metal rod completely crossed the brain in the front.

  • You may be interested: "Parts of the human brain (and functions)"

Main characteristics of psychologically mature people

What has been said so far seems to indicate a great relationship between the constructs of personal maturity, competence in emotional regulation and the affective world in general. In this sense, Individuals who enjoy a good level of maturity in the field of feelings they develop skillfully in the following competitions (Rojas, 2001):

1. Know the nature of the emotional world

That is to say, that psychologically mature people are capable of observe themselves and associate situations or events with emotional experiences .

2. Establish a solid foundation in the sentimental area

This quality refers to having experienced the feeling of love in its depth and know the necessary implications and commitments for the maintenance of such a loving relationship.

3. Possess a realistic vision of the couple

Avoid idealizations and biased perceptions of the other is essential. Having too high expectations of the relationship and the other member of the couple hinders the positive resolution of the adversities or disagreements that may arise between them.

4. Consider the other person and the relationship as one more piece of life

Emotional independence from others is very closely linked to a good level of self-esteem and self-confidence, a fundamental fact in the establishment of healthy interpersonal relationships .

5. Understand the dynamic nature of emotions and feelings

This implies considering that these phenomena are changeable and modifiable over time and that it is necessary to carry out daily actions and behaviors that constantly feed them positively.

6. Being able to give and receive love in a healthy way

This point implies having the ability to communicate the affection with verbalizations and actions, as well as being aware that this fact is part of human nature. In effect, a mature person understands that she is worthy of the intrinsic affection on the part of the other person and, therefore, that you want to correspond to it in the same way.

7. Be prepared to build a project in common with another person

Mainly, this aspect involves sharing areas of one's life with another individual in a satisfactory manner and also having the competence and commitment to wish to solve possible conflicts that may arise in its course.

8. Have sufficient qualities of intelligence, will and commitment

These three qualities imply the ability to find the balance between achieving one's vital goals and those common to the couple. The latter must be shared by both members voluntarily, so that effective communication between the two parties It becomes a fundamental and necessary aspect.

9. Maintain the long-term feeling of love

It is important to be aware that it is positive not to fall into a succession of phases of superficial infatuation. This point is linked very closely with the previous with regard to the level of commitment required so that the sentimental project has a satisfactory continuity.

10. Self-regulate

Finally, it is important to internalize that oneself can learn to internally regulate their emotions and feelings . Closely related to the first point, a mature individual is able to not be carried away by their emotions and is competent to identify, communicate and analyze them rationally in order to achieve a more adaptive final behavior.

In conclusion

It has been observed throughout the text that, broadly speaking, a psychologically mature person possesses the qualities of emotional intelligence; sense of commitment, responsibility and effort; a rational and regulated operating style (intra and interpersonal) where the world of emotions is balanced against the world of the cognitive ; and, finally, a sufficient degree of ethical and moral behavior.

In addition, aspects such as having a good level of competence in one's own knowledge, where strengths and weaknesses are assumed, are also relevant ingredients; an adequate capacity to analyze, reflect and make decisions in a coherent manner and based on solid arguments; Y a positive development of the self-image in which emotional independence from the other is the main component.

Bibliographic references:

  • Pereda, I. (2018) The map of the brain. Bonalletra Alcompas, S.L .: Spain.
  • Rojas, E. (2001) Who are you? From personality to self-esteem (4th ed.) Topics of Today: Madrid.

Mentally Fragile to Mentally STRONG! You have to listen to this! (March 2024).


Similar Articles