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How to apply the rules of coexistence at home

How to apply the rules of coexistence at home

June 12, 2024

As many families will know, Satisfactory coexistence in the home is not something that arises spontaneously , but rather should be practiced consciously by all members of this. And that, sometimes, is not a simple task.

Through the application of rules of coexistence from home , a coexistence and positive understandings are guaranteed, as well as respect among all the members of the family. Next, we explain how to create and apply these rules.

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Why is it necessary to apply rules of coexistence at home?

Within family dynamics, it is necessary to apply a series of rules of coexistence that facilitate coexistence and favor harmony and harmony.


This elaboration and application of a series of rules, in which both the rights and duties of those who live under the same roof are included, is essential regardless of the number of inhabitants of the house; being necessary both for couples without children and for families of any type or number.

In the cases of family nuclei with children will help to set limits to the behavior of the youngest or youngest . In this way, situations that can generate a conflict can be predicted and controlled.

However, the objective of the application of rules and duties at home is not only that the children comply with a series of obligations. It is necessary for parents to understand that for their children to meet the standards they must also encourage them ; being the first to fulfill them and recognize the effort of these.


In the long term, the fact of having grown up in a regulated context, which provides them with a series of duties, will develop the sense of responsibility of the children. Thing that will help them in their future adult life. However, flexibility is key so that this context does not become an ordeal for children.

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How to create and apply standards at home?

To put into practice the application of rules of coexistence, keep in mind the following.

Create norms of coexistence

The first step when creating a regulated environment is to establish what rules or guidelines should be followed at home, both at a general and individual level. The reason is logical, no person can be required to follow rules that he does not know . Also, you can not try to regulate the behavior of a child if you have not pre-established what is acceptable at home and what is not.


In this first step, parents are responsible for creating a series of rules for the home . A good idea if the children already have the ability to understand, is to create the rules among all reaching a consensus, since in this way the commitment will be much greater.

Although each family can establish the norms according to their criteria and family values, these rules must fulfill a series of characteristics that make them much more effective:

  • They must be impartial.
  • They must be clear and easily interpretable .
  • In the individual standards, these must correspond to the level of maturity of each member.
  • They must be informed to all the members of the family.
  • They must be able to be fulfilled and accepted by all .
  • They can include a conditioning.

Establish consequences

As important as creating the rules of coexistence is to establish or determine what will happen both when they are met and when they are not.

In this way, the effects can be positive in the event that the rules are followed or negative in those cases in which they are not carried out. It is important to know that positive consequences will always have a much more seductive effect and will be more effective than punishments.

The main characteristic that these consequences must have is that they must be immediate. In this way, both punishments and rewards should be applied as soon as possible once made, or not, the behavior. In this way, the relationship between action and consequence will be stronger and the behavior will be automated quickly.

On the other hand, the second characteristic to take into account is that the severity or repercussion of these consequences must correspond to the importance of the norm. That is, the consequences, both positive and negative, must be proportionate to the acts.

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The role of parents in the application of standards

Those parents who feel the need to apply rules of coexistence at home should know that their role is not limited to being police officers who keep by compliance with the rules, but also, they must guide and favor the proper behaviors of their children or the rest of the members of the family unit.

Although this seems logical, it is not fulfilled in all cases. Therefore, it is necessary for parents to know that they must also respect the rules, since they are the first point of reference for their children. And that in the case of not doing it, this could mean a lot of conflicts with the rest of the family .

Advice to implement rules of coexistence

Below are a series of specific tips or tips so that creating and applying rules at home is much easier and easier for both parents and children.

1. Dialogue

It is necessary that there is a dialogue that allows socializing the rules . Through these conversations all the members of the household will be able to understand the reason for these and their importance.

Likewise, this dialogue will allow the youngest to express their points of view and will facilitate respect for the rules by all.

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2. Rules that facilitate coexistence

With the aim that everyone respects the rules of coexistence they must have a clear and simple purpose : improve family coexistence. Therefore, these must be explained in a consistent manner with this purpose.

3. Benefits for all

Regardless of the content of these, the established standards they should benefit all family members in the same way . That is, they must be equal and offer the same benefits and obligations for all.

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4. Preaching by example

In many contexts children learn by imitation, therefore, the example of parents is essential for them to internalize the behaviors that parents want see in them.

5. Flexibility

Although one of the objectives of the rules is that they are carried out, it is counterproductive to become obsessed with them. Both parents and children must present a certain degree of flexibility , in this way the coexistence will be much more satisfactory and compliance with the rules will not become a burden.

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