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How to become a better person, in 5 basic keys

How to become a better person, in 5 basic keys

March 28, 2024

In many articles of Psychology and Mind We have emphasized the importance of making life an exciting place to travel based on goals and goals that make us stay awake and active. It is not that we are fans of positive psychology, but we are very clear that one of the keys to happiness is, precisely, to have the ability to keep improving day after day.

Improve as a person: it is possible ... and necessary

Let's not fool ourselves: to live is to try to improve yourself day after day . In fact, it is often said that happiness is nothing other than the prelude to it, that is, we are happy when we are close to achieving certain goals and goals that we have set ourselves. Happiness is not, in itself, an objective that we should mark, because - happiness - is rather a state of mind that accompanies us when we feel motivated doing things we like, spending time with people who make us feel good, And a long etcetera.


The problem is that many people have burdens and responsibilities that anchor us to a gray everyday life that does not motivate us enough to want to improve as people. In addition, we live very influenced by everything that they have inculcated us, and in many occasions we act unconsciously to the detriment of other people, and we deceive ourselves to believe that, for some reason, we are acting correctly.

Forced to be happy?

In a very interesting article, the Valencian psychologist Álvaro Saval spoke about a kind of social imperative that has taken shape in the last decade: the obligation to be (or seem) happy people. Of course, society traces a notion of happiness very closely related to material success. This material success (having a good job, a good car, expensive trips ...) can do us a disservice when trying to have a life that allows us to improve as human beings and to address our most genuine interests.


Happiness should not be an obligation but a natural consequence of living in harmony with what we want to do and be , discover our true passions and dedicate ourselves body and soul to them. To be better people, and therefore more connected with our environment, it is necessary to practice and train.

5 keys to improve as a person (and be happier)

I propose five keys to develop the necessary skills to improve as a person , little by little and without pause. Do you dare to try?

1. Be grateful and generous

There are a series of values ​​that have an instantaneous effect on the people around us. Perhaps, the two most important are generosity and gratitude. When we are generous, kind and grateful to someone we meet on the street or with a close family member, we create a good harmony that not only affects how others value us, but also how we perceive ourselves . It makes us feel good to be nice to other people because, after all, we are empathic beings.


In addition, gratitude marks the way to overcome certain traumas, anxiety and stress, helps us to eliminate the negative thoughts of our mind and strengthens our self-concept.

A good way to develop gratitude and kindness is to do altruistic acts, that is, to act well without expecting to receive anything as a counterpart. This can be shocking in a cultural system based on commercial and interested transaction, but there are many research in psychology that indicate that being supportive is linked to well-being, health and a longer life expectancy. It is not about becoming Maria Teresa of Calcutta overnight, but if we begin to give importance to altruistic acts it is very likely that we feel more fulfilled and have a greater emotional balance. To channel this council we can choose to volunteer some time ... or, simply, to be kind and detached in our day to day, with the people with whom we live or we cross the street.

2. Who has a friend has a treasure

Who has a friend, does not know what he has . In a society where we increasingly ignore each other, having one or several trusted people with whom we can share unique moments is a great value for our happiness and to be better people. Of course, I do not refer to the "friends" we can have on social networks like Facebook or similar, but to real friends, those who count on the fingers of one hand and have too many fingers.

Real friends emerge in the most unimaginable situations and contexts. We need to be aware of the importance of caring for friendships to generate that dynamism that gives us the plans in common with a colleague, or those interminable talks where we talk about anything.

One of the main causes of depression is loneliness.Living away from human treatment immerses us in a gray and monotonous reality, and therefore moves us away from happiness and motivation. If you think you do not need anyone to be happy, you are probably trying to deceive yourself, because that is not what science (and common sense) tells us. Maintaining friendships also requires effort and altruism on many occasions, but it's worth it.

3. Live life with optimism

Yes, a topic. But it does not stop being true. People who are not optimists are not better or worse than anyone, but unconsciously they are forging a boring reality, static and little given to the joys. Why? There is nothing that encourages demotivation more than not having a positive vision about the possibilities that, as a person, we have in life.

Be pessimistic Not only is it a way to self-boast yourself, but a toll-free highway to mediocrity . That is why we have to say no to pessimism and load the batteries with a good dose of optimism, although at the beginning we are not 100% convinced. If positive psychology has a certain recognition, it is precisely because of having thoroughly studied the magnificent effects of being an optimistic and enthusiastic person.

Optimism must be a philosophy of life to be able to move forward and infect those around us with good vibrations. We have to be able to devote our energies to everything that we have control over, and if we see that something escapes us, we can always turn to people to help us and give us a hand. If we face a complicated or even fatal event, such as the death of a family member, it is normal for us to collapse but we must always think that better times will come where that bad moment will only be a memory of a contingency of life.

4. Relativizes the importance of material goods

In another text published on this website, we echoed a study that states that money does not give happiness. It may seem obvious, but there are people who still believe that if they accumulate more money and riches, like cars or houses, they will be happier. Everything indicates that they are wrong. Science has shown that, overcoming a threshold in which we live in a comfortable way, earning more money no longer bears any relation to the degree of happiness.

Entrusting our well-being and happiness to material things is a way of achieving the opposite effect, a permanent unhappiness, since We will continue to want to accumulate more and more and we will never be satisfied with what we have . And this is because, after all, the good times of life are not what you share with a convertible car or with a smartphone model, but with other people who make you feel special.

When we ask ourselves the question of what really motivates us in this life, we almost all respond with a very small importance attached to the material aspects. We are not motivated to be rich or have the best watch or technological gadget. It motivates us to feel good about ourselves, to travel, to surround ourselves with sincere people and to make us feel unique .

So, why do we strive to pursue the material? Human ambition has this defect, which prioritizes tangible rewards over the intangible things of everyday life. But we must constantly remind ourselves of what we want to achieve in life and what we really value. Only then will we be taking a step forward and being better people than we used to be.

5. Spend time with the things you like to do

We have already given brushstrokes throughout the post about the importance of dedicating time and effort to those activities and people that really make us feel good . It is quite difficult to be happy if we do not dedicate time to the things that motivate us, right?

Obviously, not everyone is lucky enough to work on something that we are passionate about or to enjoy enough free time to compensate for this need, which undoubtedly makes us better people. For this, it is important to organize well and build bridges towards self-efficacy. That is to say, we must set ourselves small goals with which to improve little by little, and thus continue motivated and hooked to that hobby that we like so much.

Of course, sometimes it is difficult to become very good at what one practices. For example, I am a chess fan and play a few games every day, but I know it would be very unrealistic to think that in 5 or 10 years I will be as good as Gari Kaspárov. The small goals that we set (as, for example, in my case, could be playing a minimum of two daily games) they must serve us to move forward and remain activated, motivated by the process and not with the result . In the end, playing chess, as well as any other hobby, is a joy in itself and does not stop being because it loses a few games against players better than me. We must prioritize the enjoyment of learning over finalist issues.

In the labor field, most people are somewhat dissatisfied with the tasks they perform or the treatment they receive from their superiors. This is natural and it is not bad that we complain from time to time, but there are things we can do to make the routine a lot more pleasant . Starting, for example, for dispensing a friendly and jovial treatment with co-workers, to create a climate of closeness and cooperation.

In short, to be happy and to be better people we must walk towards habits that motivate us and keep us activated. If we are happy with what we do, others notice it.


How To Master 5 Basic Cooking Skills - Gordon Ramsay (March 2024).


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