How to express emotional pain in an appropriate way: 8 tips
Regardless of our intentions and our interests, our emotions always condition the way we behave. But, although we can not take full control of our emotional side, we can modulate the way in which it is expressed. And this is especially important when what happens to us has to do with the so-called negative emotions, which are those linked to psychological distress.
Know how to express emotional pain in an appropriate way in our lives and in our personal relationships It is, therefore, very important, because in case of leaving this task unattended, the moments of crisis can aggravate the problems in which we are involved. Outbursts of uncontrolled anger, unjustified hostility, adoption of a paralyzing defeatism ... They are psychological states that can sink us even more if we do not manage them well.
- Related article: "8 activities to work on emotions"
Why it is important to express emotional pain in a healthy way
If there is something that human beings fail to manage our emotions, that is trying to deny what makes us feel bad. Whatever we do, we will always live experiences that make us suffer , and try to show that they have not occurred or that they do not affect us is not something that helps; Unlike.
If we try to deny or omit what makes us feel bad, it is more likely that at the least indicated moment that will cause us to act in an unexpected and difficult to control way. Emotions always make their way through our actions and the way we express ourselves, and we better be prepared for modulate, even a little, those moments in which our emotional side takes control .
So, if we find ways to channel emotions linked to psychological distress, we will be able to prevent them from being misinterpreted or causing more pain to other people.
How to modulate and express emotional pain well
In order to get your emotions of psychological pain, you can help the following tips.
1. Talk to someone close to you
The fact of being able to fit your own ideas about what you feel with what others think about those ideas helps a lot.
On the one hand, it allows us to verbally express how we feel, and all this in a safe environment in which we feel supported. For the other, allows us to relativize the importance of some facts that produce emotional pain . And is that, seen from a somewhat more serene and distant perspective, some events lose dramatic power and we are able to deal with them in a more constructive way. Having a second or third opinion helps detect those ideas that are based on excessive pessimism.
2. Discharge tensions in a controlled manner: make sport
There are painful emotions that lead us to a state of tension and constant alertness. In order to express its effects in an adequate and healthy way, there is nothing like sports. If we exercise our muscles, part of this "overload" of energy will be invested in these tasks that require us to control our focus well. After these sessions, the emotional pain may still be there, but we will no longer experience it from a sense of alarm .
3. Have an explanation prepared about what happens to you
You should consider the possibility of informing the rest of what happens to you so they know how to interpret certain unusual behaviors on your part .
The simple fact of having that information prepared will not prevent you from facing those situations (improvising a "report" about what happens to you just when you are suffering the consequences of that discomfort is not comfortable and you may prefer not to do it, if necessary).
- Related article: "What is Emotional Intelligence? Discovering the importance of emotions"
4. Avoid hot arguments
When we are suffering the full effects of emotional pain, it is not time to discuss. If there is any indication that conflicting situations may appear, it is worth leaving the discussion for another time. Also, it's good to say explicitly that you postpone that conversation precisely because of that. Especially in these situations, honesty is a value to be claimed.
5. Use relaxation techniques
Intervening on physiological processes can cause anxiety to be greatly reduced. Doing this, we act on one of the fundamental aspects of behavior and mental state experienced, since making anxiety decrease creates a chain reaction that, in general, will be beneficial.
- Related article: "6 easy relaxation techniques to combat stress"
6. Write a diary
Daily monitoring of how you feel will help you better understand what happens to you while you express that emotional pain. Rereading those pages will make it easier to work constructively to solve the underlying problem , either by modifying things in your environment or by working on your emotions and your philosophy of life.
7. Beware of food
Binge eating is a common trap in which many people who go through bad times or are prey to anxiety fall. Eating offers an immediate reward, a feeling of pleasure that allows us to mask for a brief period what we would like to forget . Thus, the best possible trick is to keep a very systematic control over what is ingested, and not expose oneself to temptation. For example, literally stay away from the most addictive food.
8. Remember that nobody has the absolute truth
Something that helps a lot to express emotional pain in a healthy way is to be aware that one does not have the absolute truth about what happens. That means anger, sadness or feeling of defeat they are not elements that are there, existing independently of us, as if they were realities that we know and nothing else. Not only do we know them: we also create them.
