How to help a person with low self-esteem: 6 tips
Many of the psychological problems that people experience have to do with having low self-esteem. When this happens, the expectations that one has about what one can do and one that does not become so pessimistic that there is stagnation and, in turn, a feeling of insecurity and sadness because of comparisons with others.
The sum of these psychological phenomena give rise to consequences such as the difficulties to relate, the adoption of a style of attribution that places in oneself the guilt of all the bad that happens, and many other undesirable effects.
In this article We will see how to help a person with low self-esteem , always bearing in mind that she is the one that should promote that change to the best that she wants to see in her life, and that we will only facilitate her to succeed in it.
- Related article: "Self-concept: what is it and how is it formed?"
How to help a person who has low self-esteem
The guidelines you will see below are basic principles of action at the time of help another person build a higher self-esteem , assuming that you can deal with that person frequently. The latter is important, since eliminating old beliefs (in this case, related to oneself) and modifying thought habits is something that costs a lot, and is not achieved overnight.
1. Ask her to say good things and bad things about her
This can encompass both physical and mental abilities and abilities and aspects of personality. With highlighting three or four elements is enough, since the important thing is not so much to take into account the goodness of oneself, but to learn that what previously seemed empty of virtues and desirable properties, actually does. In this sense, once those failures and those strengths have been named, It's good that you also talk about positive aspects of the person you are trying to help, to see how they combine with those you have named.
2. Reflect together on your "weaknesses"
This step is carried out on the previous advice, and it has to do with modifying the way in which one thinks about those weaknesses perceived by oneself. This is important, because people with low self-esteem have a rather simplistic view of themselves (seeing everything in such a pessimistic way, their self-concept does not have too many nuances), and think about those aspects of oneself and see how they fit with reality, reasoning in a critical way, break with that idea that there is no possible improvement .
So, the idea is not to show that these personal failures do not exist, but to begin to see that their importance is relative, on the one hand, and that it can be improved in those aspects.
- Maybe you're interested: "10 keys to increase your self-esteem in 30 days"
3. Review the attribution style
Ask him to recall the latest negative or harmful life experiences who thinks they were your fault. By asking questions about these events, you can begin to see these experiences in another way, as something that has several causes, many of which have nothing to do with oneself. In this way, whenever you are tempted to assume that something bad about what has happened is your fault, you will be more likely to stop to analyze in detail what really happens.
- Related article: "Fundamental Error of Attribution: pigeonholing people"
4. Encourage him to develop compassion towards his person
The simple fact of taking into account that you leave a bad time (marked by low self-esteem) makes the possible failures that are going to commit in the future to be seen in another way. If you do not start on equal terms with the rest, it is unfair to compare yourself: others do not have to deal with the insecurities and the self-esteem problem you are trying to get rid of. It is rather a personal struggle, in which the comparisons are over .
5. Go with that person to exercise
This is one of the most useful tips, since doing sports regularly allows you to combat self-esteem problems in different ways. On the one hand, an objective is created whose achievement is not based on complicated or confusing plans, but rather in the constant effort and the fact of not giving up . This motivates and contributes a component of purpose that is missing in the life of many people with self-esteem problems.
Secondly, their results are aesthetically noticeable and can be passively checked by other people, which makes expectations of causing a bad impression diminish. Finally, being healthier makes you feel better in general, so that you tend to evoke more positive memories, and this affects your self-esteem.
6. If necessary, encourage him to go to the psychologist
In some extreme cases it is necessary to go to a psychology professional to intervene through their therapy services . Help that person to decide to go to the psychologist, and if necessary help him choose a center to go to.
