How to know if your partner uses you (in 10 keys)
Psychologists and sociologists have tried to understand human behavior about love for decades, a feeling or human motivation that can change a person's life.
Happiness and consummate love are almost synonymous; However, being together is not always easy, and conflicts between members can appear at any time.
- Recommended article: "The 14 types of couple: what are they?"
Does our partner want us or use us?
But in spite of the specific disputes that can arise in a couple relationship and that have to do many times with the differences in the deep values, the way of thinking or the beliefs and opinions that a person wants, sometimes, one can not feel loved by your lover and doubt the love of this or this "Does our partner want us or is it simple interest?", We can even ask ourselves .
Although there are no exact rules to determine this, if we can observe certain indications that can lead us to believe that what really feels for us our partner is pure and hard interest. Of course, these signals are not 100% accurate, and may be manifested for other reasons.
What are these keys? In the following lines you can find 10 keys that will help you to detect if your partner uses you.
1. It does not support you in important decisions or when you need it
Our partner is one of the most important people in your life, so you should show support in difficult times and important decisions. If, for example, you are in an examination period or you are in opposition, you should be by your side and understand the situation instead of continually demanding things that he or she is interested in.
If it does not support you in important decisions or is there when you need it , you may really want something that you have. Unfortunately, what you have among you may not be true love.
- To learn more about true love, you can read our article: "True love should meet these 40 requirements"
2. It does not make you feel good with your comments and does not respect you
If in authentic love your partner is by your side and lends your support, you must also show respect and not damage your dignity. Logically, differences can arise in a relationship and conflicts can appear at specific moments when each defends their position.
Now, when the person is continually discrediting you, insulting you, treating you badly or humiliating you, it is possible that he will use you, because he does not take you into account as a person, nor does he take into account your needs. Someone who damages his partner continuously, does not want it .
3. Do not consider your opinion
Again, respect is basic in any relationship and manifests itself in mature love, that love that is rational and that favors the well-being of the couple.
Coexistence with someone is a constant negotiation and, therefore, there must be a balance between the needs of both members . Therefore, a person who loves you will take your opinion into account, even though it does not coincide with it. When this does not happen and the other person is constantly imposing their criteria, it may not be love but interest. .
4. You are not your priority
When we are in love we want to be with someone in body and mind, and that person becomes our priority. That does not mean you have to be with that person 24 hours a day, but there is an interest in being together .
Now, when interest is the reason why the other person is with you, he will only look for you at specific moments and make many plans if you. He will only want to be with you when he wants to take advantage of something.
5. It is not congruent with the love that says you feel
Surely you have heard the phrase "the words are blown by the wind". This phrase, very popular and has a lot of truth.
When a person loves you, it is congruent with what he says and his actions agree with his words . People speak through their actions, so if your behavior and what you verbalize is not consistent, maybe the reason your partner is with you is not love. In these cases, you can promise a lot but not fulfill your words.
6. Just looking to have intimate relationships
One of the most obvious signs that your partner uses you is when you only want to have sex with you , that is, that is their only interest for which to spend time with you. When you do not make plans together or all you want is to stay to have intimate relationships instead of going out to dinner and being seen in public, you can begin to doubt their love.
7. It does not do things for you if it does not benefit from it
The truth is that when you want to be with someone, sometimes you do things that you do not want just to make your partner feel good.Accompanying him to a concert or taking him to the university because his car has been damaged (when you had stayed with your friends) are some examples.
It's not about continually giving in to your wishes without considering your own, but your partner, if he loves you, will also make sacrifices for you. Is that why you have decided that it is the person that accompanies you for the rest of your life, no?
8. It is always you who pay
Perhaps you have a lot of economic capital and doubts about the love your partner feels towards you, because one of the biggest interests in life is money. Does your partner never pay anything when you go out with him or her? Does he continually ask you to buy him things? I may just want that from you, so watch how he behaves in these situations.
9. Much of your environment tells you
Sometimes, you may be so in love with your partner that, despite observing the previous signs, you want to deceive yourself to not recognize that your partner uses you.
Now, in addition to what you think, Do others (family, friends, etc.) tell you continuously? Do the people in your life alert you that your partner's behavior may indicate that he or she uses you? Better than reflections on the matter and use your most rational side.
10. He does not tell you anything too personal he does not care about your life
Is not your interpersonal relationship intimate and does not trust each other? Do you find it hard to talk about your life with you and rarely care about yours? Maybe you are not interested in your achievements or successes or in your goals or concerns in your life. When someone gives himself to another person, one feels loved. Is not that true with your partner? Well, think objectively about the type of relationship you have with your lover.
