How to maintain a friendship, in 6 tips
Maintaining a friendship is a task that many people overlook . Especially if these affective bonds are asymmetrical, that is, one part gives a lot and does not receive as much, it is easy for one of the friends to get used to having the advantages that being "friend of ..." gives.
So, it never hurts to remember that it is necessary to maintain a friendship through small acts of everyday life. Friendship is demonstrated by facts.
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How to maintain a healthy and functional friendship
Some people assume that friendships are like a noble title: a label that, unless something goes terribly wrong, will be conserved for life. However, this belief is totally false for a very simple reason: maintaining a friendship is not something that depends on ourselves and our existence. It is an emotional and affective bond that must be fed from its two extremes and that, if it is not taken care of, with time it withers.
Unfortunately, not everyone takes this idea into account, and they assume that they will always have the friendship of those who today laugh with their jokes, share the special moments and lend their help when necessary.
For this class of friends, friendship perpetuates itself in time, as if it did not depend on the acts of the people and had its own entity . When they realize that time has worn away this link, it is already too late, and their attempts to rebuild that union seem fruit of interest and opportunism.
On the other hand, knowing that friendships should be maintained is not something that starts from the defense of morals, but rather part of the most basic knowledge of psychology. Beyond what we think or what we think is good or bad, the fact is that who stops having incentives to be friends with someone, simply devote less time and effort to that person , unless the whole relationship is based on a dependency bond and therefore it is not a friendship but a toxic relational dynamic. Considering this ... what can we do? Next we will review several tips to maintain a friendship.
1. Periodically dedicate time to that person.
Whatever happens, a friendship is demonstrated by dedicating moments to share experiences with that person. It is a necessary but not sufficient measure, because everything else must be built on it. Otherwise, it is very likely that there will not be an event that confronts both people, but the fact that the months have gone by and no one has spoken It will make you, however much you have a good memory of that friend, arrive at a point where you can not count on your friendship.
Therefore, it is good to reserve certain moments to talk with that friend. Although it is not close, the new technologies allow to speak in a similar way to what would happen in a dialogue in person. There is no excuse for not having a regular contact.
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2. Remember the symbolic dates
This is another one of those examples that with little you can obtain an emotional impact of gain. Remember a significant date, especially if it has to do with a shared experience , shows clearly that for us that person is important. Beyond the birthday there are many other memorable days: the day on which we started a trip, the day on which the first conversation took place, etc.
3. Lend your help
If you know that the other person is going through a bad time, do not look for any excuse not to offer your help. There are those who try to avoid this kind of situations simply because they do not know how to deal with them and they are afraid of hurting the other person, making them think about what worries them, but in any case leaving the comfort zone is recommended , because what can be lost (experiencing an uncomfortable moment) is nothing compared to what can be gained.
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4. Expand your social circle if you wish
This is another way to strengthen a friendship. Make him come into contact with other people in your social circle It not only enriches your life and is a gift in itself . Also, it is useful for your friend to know you better, through those who also know you.
5. Invest in honesty
Friendship is a space in which we can afford to be very honest. If you make honesty define you in this type of social relations, you will be demonstrating that you can expect almost direct access to your thoughts and opinions , and that they will not be establishing a friendship with a facade.
6. Use humor
Friendship relationships are those in which humor has more value, since you can joke with many more things, whenever it is done making it clear that they are to laugh together . Therefore, some laughter helps to relativize the importance of problems, which makes the dialogues based on this sense of genuine humor become a safe space in which everyone can act as it is without fear of being judged.
