How to overcome insecurity: 5 psychological tips
Many people suffer from problems of insecurity. Feeling that one is not up to the circumstances, that everyone is capable of progressing but one does not have enough ability, etc. Coping with this type of self-sabotage is not easy, but getting it is usually a good thing, since it facilitates the resolution of several problems derived from it.
In this article we will review some basic tips to know how to overcome insecurity through changes that must be introduced into day-to-day habits.
- Related article: "Low self-esteem? When you become your worst enemy
How insecurities arise
As practically everything in psychology, insecurity has multiple causes, although there are several that are very common. Fundamentally, it's about a distorted view about one's own abilities , from an extremely pessimistic point of view, that generates a self-fulfilling prophecy effect.
That is to say, the fact of having very low expectations about what one is capable of doing, does not even have exciting initiatives that are a challenge. With the passage of time, this perception of staying in a state of stagnation reinforces insecurities and low self-esteem.
The idea that much of this monotony and absence of vital milestones achieved is due to the fact that stays in the comfort zone it does not take on sufficient prominence so that the perception of one's own defects determines the way in which we think about ourselves.
On the other hand, one of the areas of life in which insecurities are more noticeable are personal relationships. Something as simple as adopting a nonverbal language that denotes insecurity gets the effect that others treat us consistently, so that in each conversation and social interaction the message is captured that effectively, there are reasons to feel insecure. It is a vicious circle that with the passage of time comes to generate a dogma, a belief that is not even questioned: we are worth less than others.
How to overcome insecurity on a day-to-day basis
Below you will find several ideas from which you can start to reinforce your self-esteem progressively. Keep in mind that the simple act of reading will not solve a problem of insecurities, but this is achieved by introducing different habits in the day to day, of which we will talk in the following lines.
In any case, it is important to bear in mind that the objective is not to eliminate insecurities, but to overcome them; that is to say, avoid interfering in a significant way with one's well-being , or that are obstacles to develop all the personal potential that is available.
1. Write down your strengths and insecurities
Even the most insecure people are able to recognize certain things that, in pursuit of the rest of their repertoire of skills, are good for them. Therefore, a good starting point is to write down a list of weaknesses and a list of personal strengths. It is important that these are valued not by comparing ourselves with the rest, but by comparing those physical and psychological characteristics that belong to oneself.
This step will allow two things. On the one hand, it is a starting point that helps to focus more on how good you have , and on the other, if it is done with a certain periodicity, it helps to have information about how their own insecurities evolve.
2. Check the paranoia tendencies
Many people base their insecurity on almost paranoid thoughts, constantly pondering the supposed intentions of hurting or mocking us that others hide behind an appearance of normality. Therefore, it is good to spend about five minutes, at the end of the day, looking back and assess if you have fallen into this kind of thoughts in an unjustified way .
3. Ask for space from others
The changes must not only occur in oneself, but the social environment must also evolve. After all, when it is insecure, the restopuede tend to make hurtful assessments aloud, even without having a direct intention to cause harm, simply because they see that kind of criticism fit with what the other person thinks about himself. same There where others remain silent opinions to not spend the day criticizing the person with whom they speak, this regulation of what is said diminishes before those who have low self-esteem.
So, it is good to express directly that certain comments are too much, given that they are inconvenient. The good thing about these situations is that the other person, in most cases, will stop trying to maintain a dominant position in the conversation if it is someone who has affection for us, and will immediately see his error. On the other hand, this is an assertiveness exercise that helps to reinforce the self-esteem by the simple fact of seeing that this class of complaints are accepted by the other, denoting that many of the criticisms received in the day to day are unfounded.
- Maybe you're interested: "Assertiveness: 5 basic habits to improve communication"
4. Do not compare yourself with strangers
With the rise of social networks, it is extraordinarily easy to give an image of what is not. One in which only the positive is highlighted, and the negative is ignored. This is something that facilitates the appearance of insecurities, because in certain digital platforms idealization is the norm .
Therefore, whenever you are assaulted by a thought based on your own inferiority to others that are fundamentally known through Facebook, Instagram or similar, remember that it is a mirage. There is no reason to think that this person is perfect or even almost perfect, and there are many reasons to think that the image one has of that "other" is very distorted.
5. Practice sports and eat well
The good thing about this pattern is that it is based on the repetition of relatively simple behavior patterns. Seeing how it progresses physically over a few months is very motivating, and helps improve self-esteem.
