How to stop being a jealous person? 12 ways to achieve it
Jealousy is one of the most harmful phenomena that can be experienced in a loving relationship. And although to a greater or lesser extent many people may become jealous, there is a difference between what is considered normal and what is considered pathological. Relationships can be complicated, but jealousy, without a doubt, contributes to their deterioration and degradation.
Jealous behavior comes to light because of unrealistic beliefs and the insecurity that the person has , and usually cause obsessive thoughts that are not healthy at all. It is a couple problem that often is not overcome and, in extreme cases, it must be treated by a professional, since marked jealousy is usually the cause of low self-esteem, a paranoid personality or a possessive character, among other reasons.
- Related articles: "The types of jealousy and their different characteristics"
How to stop being a jealous person
Jealousy causes great pain and suffering for both partners. If you think that you are acting jealously and you think that this is affecting your relationship, you better put a stop to your behavior before the situation enters a vicious circle.
Below you can find a series of tips that will make you reflect on how you are behaving.
1. Recognize that you behave jealously
¿How to stop being jealous or jealous? The following tips will not help you if you do not recognize that your behavior is being exaggerated and is unhealthy for your relationship.
It is clear that self-criticism is not always easy , but surely you are able to recognize that your way of acting is damaging your partner and is turning you into a tremendously unhappy person.
2. Have the will to change
If you have already recognized that you are being jealous, the next step is to do something to transform your way of behaving. Change is not easy, especially when you feel insecure. If you are aware that you are jealous or jealous, you will have to transform your way of thinking so as not to lose that person you love so much. You can only do this with will and if you put on your part.
3. Detect jealousy
If you have already recognized that you have a problem and are willing to change, you need to detect when you are behaving jealously. And it is that jealousy can manifest itself in many moments. For example, c When the fear of being unfaithful invades you to know that your partner is going to dinner company.
You need to recognize when you lose your nerves and if these thoughts you have are real or are the result of your imagination (that is, you have no proof that your partner is having an affair with another person).
4. Think realistically
Once you have detected that you are behaving too exaggeratedly, it is time to make an effort to change, otherwise, jealousy will invade you. If the thought of "your partner is with someone" appears in your mind, think about the times your love has shown you and in the null evidence you have to accuse him.
5. Work on you
Jealousy is often the result of low self-esteem and insecurity. Jealous people, in addition, they suffer great emotional dependence , because they feel a great concern to be abandoned. That's why the first step to overcoming jealousy is to work on yourself.
6. Trust your partner
Confidence in the couple and jealousy are incompatible, so it is necessary that you learn to trust your partner. The good health of the relationship is based on mutual respect and trust , that's why you should let him enjoy his own life. Relationships work when the two members have their own space, so do not spoil what has united you and what has made you so happy together.
7. Find out what it is that makes you jealous or jealous
It is possible that jealousy may have arisen because of your low self-esteem or because you have had a traumatic experience in an old relationship. Therefore, it is necessary to find out what it is that makes you behave like this, because in this way you can understand better what happens to you. Look for clues in your behavior .
8. Forget the past
Once you have detected what the problem is, if what is causing you to react like this is the fault of some past relationship, better you pass page and enjoy the present moment . Bad experiences have something good, and that is that they make us grow and become a better person if we learn from them.
9. Focus on the good of your relationship
Surely your relationship has very good things, and that is why you are with the person you love so much.If you want your life not to end, you better focus on positive things instead of letting your irrational thoughts interfere with your love.
10. Improve communication with your partner
The communication can avoid conflicts in the relationship , so it is good that you spend more time with your partner, communicate with them, if you know their needs, and show their trust respect. And if something worries you, you'd better tell him. Of course, you must be careful when talking about this sensitive topic.
11. Practice Mindfulness
Mindfulness is a very powerful tool to improve interpersonal relationships and also jealousy. It can help you interpret situations more realistically, improve your emotional self-knowledge and to treat your partner and yourself with compassion. All these elements are positive for your well-being and will allow you to see life from another perspective.
To deepen this practice, you can read our article: "Mindfulness: 8 benefits of mindfulness"
12. Go to psychological therapy
It is important to understand that the previous points, sometimes, may not have an effect, because if jealousy is pathological, it is necessary go to psychological therapy to treat the root problem . Whether due to low self-esteem, lack of social skills or a traumatic experience from the past, psychological therapy provides tools to overcome this problematic situation.
- Related article: "The 8 benefits of going to psychological therapy"