Placereado: a good technique to connect with your partner
Already in a previous article, we talked about the importance of expanding our sexual repertoire leaving aside the co-centrism (focusing the sexual relationship almost exclusively on penetration) prevailing in our culture.
Today we propose a technique that is used in sexual therapy in order to reduce tension in the couple when problems appear. This strategy is a variant of the one developed by Masters and Johnson in the sixties and seventies, which they called "Sensory Focus".
However, it is not necessary to suffer a sexual problem in the environment of the couple to enjoy a session of mutual caresses, so the Placereado becomes a fun and enjoyable exercise that helps connect with the couple.
In the same way that Masters and Johnson established several levels within this technique, we will also diversify in three steps, Placereado 1, 2 and 3. Today we present the first .
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How to do the Placereado 1 as a couple?
1. It is preferable to plan the day on which we will do the exercise , although it can also work in these cases improvise it. Although there is not a minimum of times to perform, the more we do it the more we will observe its benefits.
2. We will look for an ideal place that meets certain preferences such as: privacy, adequate temperature, comfort (the bed is ideal for doing the exercise), or environmental preferences (relaxing music, dim lighting, candles, etc.). It is important to turn off the phone or put it in silent mode to avoid interruptions.
3. It is also essential to have a good attitude, be motivated Do not be too tired or in full digestion.
4. We started the exercise . One of the members of the couple lies naked face down and with closed eyes. The other, also naked, in a comfortable position begins to caress his partner gently from the head to the feet without forgetting any body part. It is not about doing a massage but to transmit our emotion through the hands, so the stimulation should be relaxed and pleasant.
5. When the one who is caressing reaches the feet , the one who is lying turns around and repeats the exercise ahead as before, except for genitals and breasts, since we are in Placereado 1. The body stimulation should last at least fifteen minutes in total (about seven minutes per face) of the body).
6. After this, the eyes open, the one that was lying down gets up and a few minutes are dedicated to comment on how they felt, the quality of the caresses, the affections, etc. Then, the roles are changed, the one that has received the caresses is now performed and vice versa and the exercise is repeated as described in the previous points.
7. At the end of the exercise, the couple decides what will be next, whether to initiate a sexual relationship or not , since there is no previous premise of ending up excited or having sex when finished. The objective of this strategy is not therefore to "force" anything more than to give and receive pleasurable caresses. We can use this experience to learn to ask, to know how to say yes or no, according to the wishes of each one and to accept the negative ones without getting upset, or living them as rejection.
What can we achieve by doing a Placereado 1?
- This technique helps us to degenitalize our sexual relations , that is, to use other parts of our body for a pleasant purpose, something that will undoubtedly expand our erotic sensitivity throughout the skin. Do not forget that the current culture inculcates us focus sexual relationship almost exclusively on genital stimulation and this exercise makes it easier to add elements making sex more fun.
- With this exercise we get to give and receive pleasure without feeling guilt and without the need for counterparts since the stimulation will be reciprocal. In this way, we combat that macho role about the active role that men must play in terms of taking the initiative and responsibility of the relationship and the supposed passive role of women. Enjoying both roles, passive and active, enriches the relationship.
- It also helps us keep our mind in "erotic mode" . If we achieve during the exercise to maintain the attention in the caresses and the sensations that this produces, we will be able to train the mind to be in the present and evade us of unproductive thoughts, norms or beliefs that do not facilitate the relaxation, something very frequent when sexual dysfunctions appear . (A selection of erotic phrases, here).
- It is a technique of choice against certain sexual problems, since it allows to work on basic objectives such as the deconditioning of the anxiety associated with the sexual relationship characteristic of these problems.
In short, a different exercise that allows us to relax and connect with our partner. In the next article we will discuss the variants offered by Placereado 2 and 3 and their practical applications.
- Masters, W, H. and Johnson, V.E. (nineteen ninety six). Human sexual response Buenos Aires. Inter-medical.