Psychological profile of the unfaithful person, in 5 main features

April 2, 2024

The unfaithful person, in addition to being represented usually in art forms that rely on drama (is one of the favorite characters in the annals of literature, film, television and all arts where the heart can mourn their sorrows) , it exists much beyond fiction and is not limited to some isolated cases.

At present, and despite the fact that monogamy is the predominant model in a large part of the planet, infidelity is at the center of Western families, because every day there are more cases of couples or marriages that are affected and that enter into crisis because of this phenomenon.

However, when we talk about infidel people, we refer to individuals who tend to commit infidelities systematically, not as an exception but as a rule. We'll see now the patterns of behavior and the psychological profile of the infidel , in addition to some clearly external factors that affect the environment towards the individual.

Related article: "The 9 types of infidelity and their characteristics"

What is the psychological profile of the unfaithful person?

As we have seen, the unfaithful person is an individual used to having relationships that break with the basic rules on which the couple is based. Now ... what is it that makes their relationships so unstable and with such diffuse limits? At the center of this question is the way in which the unfaithful person manages attachment with others .

A study developed by the University of Florida, determined that the unfaithful person has the tendency to develop a form of attachment called "insecure attachment". This theory ensures that the primary relationships established with parents and caregivers during childhood and the first years of life have a decisive influence on the relationships that take place in adult life. And it seems that all its manifestations are related to the profile of the unfaithful person.

According to the attachment theory of John Bowlby (1907-1990), those who have developed insecure attachment tend to have the following characteristics in adulthood, depending on the type of affection and primary relationships under which they have developed their attachment. We meet three types of infidel people:

1. Anxious attachment

Adults who exhibit this type of attachment are more sensitive to rejection and anxiety, have deficiencies in controlling their impulses and a constant dissatisfaction. They also fear being rejected by the sentimental couple, and that is why they engage in a constant and impulsive relationship, seeking approval.

Some research in psychology indicates that unfaithful people are usually also the most jealous , a question that in the end reveals a great inferiority complex and a weak self-esteem that needs to be reaffirmed by liking other people and very frequently. Curious, right?

2. Avoidance attachment

This type of individuals has learned to give less importance to their emotional expressions. In other words, they are people who show colder and they will tend to stay more distant, so their relationships will be less deep, or they will be given less emotional charge. They constantly present elusive behaviors, high levels of hostility and aggressiveness, and for them being unfaithful will not have the same emotional weight as for ordinary people. In short, high rates of negative interactions with the couple will appear.

3. Disorganized attachment

These people do not establish a relationship with sufficient security and conviction, and They tend to exhibit unpredictable and badly organized behavior . In this case, they are not very understanding, and it will be extremely difficult for them to be understood by their counterpart. The characteristics of this personality type in terms of their affective relationship will contribute to this having little continuity.

What other factors that lead to infidelity

As we have said before, the psychological profile of the unfaithful person is highly complex, and there is no single definition or cause that classifies or identifies them as such. Besides the three big labels of Bowlby, there are many other factors that reveal the psychological profile of the infidel , which will be detailed below:

1. The risk

Those who tend to make risky decisions or they show a sense of the most accented adventure They are more likely to be unfaithful compared to people who are more fearful. It is very likely that there is a genetic component involved in risk behaviors, since the mere fact of being unfaithful includes a component with a high possibility of failure.

2. The power

It is one of the most influential and definitive characteristics. People in a position of power are extremely likely to be unfaithful . Power increases one's confidence and self-esteem, which leads individuals to act more assertively and extraverted. The powerful are more likely to establish direct eye contact, stand with confidence poses (body language) and show themselves as a potential lover.

3. Sexual desire

Sexual desire varies from one person to another. The levels of libido They have a genetic component that is difficult to control. Some individuals have a high interest in sex while other people project less interest in the matter. Being a purely physical component, some people are inherently easier to be driven by their sexual desire.

In this specific case, Men tend to have a greater sex drive , which leads them to carry the baton of purely sexual and non-affective infidelity.

4. Psychopathy

Society has taught us to see in love and romance as a sacred and eternal bond between two individuals. Other people see in love a game in which the objective is to manipulate the other person and gain power over the sentimental partner through emotional blackmail, something very typical of individuals with a high degree of psychopathy. People who see love as a game they are much more likely to have multiple love interests; cheating and lying is just another way to gain control of the spouse.

Maybe you're interested: "Psychological profile of the emotional blackmailer, in 5 traits and habits"

5. The economic level

The attractiveness of a person greatly influences the likelihood that he or she is unfaithful. Attraction is manifested in different ways. It is influenced by physical appearance (it is the first thing that the eyes see), social skills (charisma, gift of speech) and tangible resources such as money. The closer we are to what is most demanded, the more likely we are to be unfaithful.

Those people who have better education, higher income and successful careers they are more likely to develop an unfaithful profile than individuals with less purchasing power or access to education, in part because they are more exposed to the type of people who gather more characteristics considered superficially attractive.

Is there any possible solution?

We have two points of view to address the conflict . First, you can focus the solution by focusing the focus on the individual with the psychological profile of infidel who can not have a stable relationship and wants it; You can also focus on the couple, if the pillar of the problem has to do more with external factors that influence one or the other is unfaithful.

On the other hand, when the problem focuses more than anything on a reality of the two, there must be predisposition on the part of the couple to solve a situation of such severity, as long as both have the sincere desire to continue with the relationship . In some cases the reciprocal infidelities occur in those moments in which both parties want to end the relationship.

In both cases, the participation of an appropriate professional is necessary. Always seek the help of an expert counselor in sentimental relationships, since dealing with this type of problem on your own usually seems extremely difficult. The introduction of a third and more objective external opinion will help more constructive talks.

Likewise, we must take into account that couple therapy will not always offer a solution , and even less instantaneous. The will of the affected party is elementary if a satisfactory outcome is to be found.