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Self-confidence: discover the 7 keys to improve it

Self-confidence: discover the 7 keys to improve it

February 27, 2024

In a world where more and more things are demanded of us, work on improving levels of self-confidence remains the great unresolved issue . Having deficits in this aspect not only causes emotional pain, but it predisposes us to act as people who do not trust themselves. And that, in addition to being a source of problems, makes others treat us as if we needed help for anything.

Tips to work your self-confidence

Against this destructive dynamic, here are some starting points to improve the levels of self-confidence and self-esteem and make the image you have of yourself to work in your favor.

1. Coldly consider your options

To distance yourself from your own person and analyze the things you do as if you were a external observer It will help you recognize those situations and habits in which you self-sabotage. If you have long since noted with low self-esteem, it is very likely that you have entered a vicious circle of anxiety and bad self-image that is difficult to leave without trying. Therefore, taking a third-person point of view will help you see this vicious circle in full and it will be easier to take matters into your own hands.


How to do this? Very easy. When you notice that there is something that creates anguish and that undermines your self-confidence, stop to think about the different options with which you can face this situation and choose the one that you think will benefit you in the medium or long term.

The key: overcome the tendency to stay in your bubble

Watch that your conception of what is "better" in the long term is not influenced by your desire to opt for the comfortable solution . If you want to do things differently than you usually do, you will have to leave your comfort zone. For example, if you think that one of your academic papers has received a lower score than expected, the easiest option may be to do nothing, but if you go to the revision of the correction so that the person who has corrected you Explain why you have failed. You are likely to learn things, although facing your mistakes can be somewhat uncomfortable.


2. Do the same with your negative habits

This distanced point of view should not act only when considering your possibilities of action, but also as method to detect those thoughts that undermine your levels of self-confidence . Having a good self-image does not consist in having an objective image of oneself (that would be impossible, with the amount of things you know about your person), but in having a self-image that is useful to you.

What makes the difference when building a positive self-image is the selective attention . When you do not have very good consideration, all that information about you and your actions comes to you after having passed through a filter that makes you see everything in a pessimistic key. In this way, you will have a propensity to pay close attention to things that go wrong, while your merits will go unnoticed. Since this bias is going to be there, whatever you do, take advantage! Detecting those thoughts about you that are unfair and recognizing them as such will help you to minimize them.


Changing your thoughts to play in your favor

While you are seeing the amount of unrealistic negative thoughts about your own person, you will be more aware of your ability to actively participate in the construction of adequate levels of self-confidence, because you will realize that what you knew about you was biased by your state of mind. You can also turn the situation around counterattacking with positive thoughts and paying more attention to things that speak well about you . This will not change only your perception about your personality, but it will also make you act differently and, as a final effect, improve your levels of self-confidence.

3. Stop comparing yourself always with the same people

You must stop comparing yourself with other people. If you can not avoid comparing yourself, it's because you probably do not know them enough. Nowadays social networks and the media make it very easy for specific people to offer only their best side and lock many other things under lock. And all this, with or without a paid image consultant.

The importance of feeling at ease with oneself

Think, for example, of the time you have devoted to choosing the photos that you will upload in your virtual profiles, or the meticulousness with which you choose certain phrases. That's what a lot of people are constantly doing about which you get news every day, and it is very possible that many of them still worry more than you in making sure all this news talk about a fascinating personality . Therefore, working on your self-confidence should include a phase in which you go from idealizing these people to humanizing them, that is, considering their shortcomings or the lack of information about them.

If our own way of thinking already incorporates selective attention patterns, the mass media and the Internet make this access restricted to a few data even more definitive. Which brings us to the next point.

4. Recognize the effects that propaganda exerts on your self-esteem

Self-confidence and self-esteem are intimately related, and that's why you should look at both if you want to intervene on your chances of changing your attitude and emotional style . However, there are very powerful propaganda and advertising devices that are almost exclusively responsible for offering niche markets to large organizations by way of creating insecurities for people. If you are a woman, for example, you may have noticed that there is great media pressure to pressure women with the ideal of feminine beauty, something that ultimately does not exist. Something similar happens with practically all the elements of our life: the architecture, the cars, the personality of the movie heroes, etc.

Detoxify from the ideals of cinema and television

Realize that self-esteem, whether positive or negative, is something that can be learned and unlearned and how they influence media and cultural elements It serves to see that a negative self-image does not reflect our own nature. Therefore, consider the social pressures that influence us is essential to preserve the authenticity and not let the publicity sink us emotionally.

5. Take care of your health

Although self-confidence is subjective, it is easier to make it positive if you introduce small objective changes in your life. Maintaining good habits of regular exercise, proper nutrition and hygiene is something easy to achieve and, in addition to providing benefits of all kinds, can improve your self-esteem indirectly.

Healthy mens in corpore sano

When our body works better, it is noticed by everyone (and also by oneself). There is multiple studies that relate physical well-being to mental well-being , so you should not underestimate this point.

6. Sleep well

Not only because of what has already been said in the previous point, but because it is totally essential. Not sleeping properly produces fatigue and stress, which affects our way of interpreting things and, of course, also has an effect on postures that we adopt It is difficult to trust yourself when you walk around all day with your head down.

7. Face realistic challenges and fulfill them

If you want to work on your self-confidence you should focus your actions thinking about the repercussion that they will have on your self-esteem. In some way, you must leave messages to your future self so that it is he who will read himself with more kind eyes (in part, this is what is explained in the first point).

The art of setting ambitious but affordable goals

Therefore, you should see what goals or objectives, far from being useful, do nothing but damage your self-image by being unrealistic. If you want to make progress in this regard, focus on the goals you can address and jump on them , without leaving it for the next day.


HOW TO BUILD SELF ESTEEM - THE SIX PILLARS OF SELF-ESTEEM BY NATHANIEL BRANDEN ANIMATED BOOK REVIEW (February 2024).


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