Smart women tend to be single
It is often said that smart women are those who lead an independent life . And it is not easy, because there are still a series of social norms and clichés that tend to chain women around the tasks culturally attributed to them: the care of the children and the husband, as well as the elderly in the home.
Luckily, times have changed and women can choose what they want to dedicate to or with whom they want to share their life ... and may even decide to stay single. This will be discussed in today's article.
The imposition of marriage: condemned to form a family?
We must start from a summary reflection: every woman must be free to choose her own destiny . This includes the possibility of falling in love, of forming a family, never falling in love or going from flower to flower. There is nothing wrong with any of these options (or any other).
It happens that certain stereotypes that place women in a subaltern role in our society still weigh, especially as regards how they should lead their love and sexual lives. Cultural patterns affect us all, and particularly women. Hence, many of the sayings and recurring phrases that aim to indicate to women how to act in relation to their love life and their motherhood: "Look, at 35 years old and you still have not married", "marry Pepito who has a business and it is a good match "" in the end you will pass the rice "... Phrases with a deep draft and that, even unconsciously, influence the way they act or stop acting.
Between happiness and resignation
Another saying very repeated is the one that says that "ignorance gives happiness". Certainly, It can be difficult for an intelligent woman with concerns beyond the typical to find a man with whom to express themselves freely and feeling intellectually stimulated. This, not to mention the sapiosexuality.
The social pressure of your close circle can be quite annoying for the girl who, being intelligent, can not connect with another person (whether of the same sex or not, because of course you can also be homosexual and bisexual in this life), Unlike their friends, who seem to have a kind of magnet for love relationships. While the latter can reproduce the cultural slogan with less reluctance, the former tend to remain firm in their position.
A study confirms it: single women tend to be smarter
So, why do smarter women tend to stay single? Is there any objective reason why heterosexual men or homosexual women do not have as a priority to maintain an affective relationship with an intelligent woman? Is there any kind of aversion, conscious or unconscious, toward bright women?
There may be a certain pattern from which the most intelligent women are at the same time the most demanding and, therefore, tend to remain single. It's just a hypothesis, but it might make sense, especially after the research titled "Why intelligent men choose less intelligent women?", which has been published in Daily Mail and Elite Daily, among others.
In this study, the academic John Carney explains that less intelligent women usually have much more free time because they are not able to obtain sufficient economic benefits if they study more or work more hours than usual, which tend to be paired with men of higher intelligence who, statistically, are the ones who They tend to have better jobs and salaries, which helps them to advance economically and enjoy a higher life train. One conclusion, that of John Carney, which, of course, has unleashed a strong controversy.
The other side of the coin: men look for women ... not so smart
It seems, however, that the motivations of men when finding a partner also leave a little to be desired from a moral prism . As Carney argues, they look for a woman who prioritizes their relationship and the family project on any other aspect of life, and of course there are women, usually the 'not so intelligent', who are willing to assume this premise.
The dangers and problems of being an intelligent woman
And it is that, as it is clear, Being an intelligent woman has great disadvantages . Probably, if any woman had to choose between being or not being smart, she would have an important dilemma before her. Because, although a priori everyone would choose to be intelligent, the reality is that enjoying a privileged mind entails many problems to face real life.
It is often said, and I think it is a topic that is not at all misguided, that "dumb" women (if I may say so) are not taken seriously by men. But in fact, smart women are taken seriously by male colleagues, maybe too seriously , to the point that they perceive them as rivals and not as much as potential partners.
This being the case, women from any part of the planet live in constant tension: if they are less intellectually graceful they are often perceived as little more than sexual objects and housewives, and if they are intelligent women, they are perceived as an undesirable threat, as a competitor for that managerial position in the company.
Deepening in the study
Carney's study was made to a total of 121 people of British nationality . The results have given a lot to talk about: being asked about heterosexual couple relationships in which the woman had a clearly superior intelligence, the respondents perceived them as problematic and less desirable.
When the question was asked the other way round (being the most intelligent man in the relationship), the respondents did not report any criticism or censure towards them, but quite the contrary: they perceived them as more desirable.
Gender stereotypes that will take time to destroy
This is another proof of the different stereotypes that, in the 21st century, continue to explain why women suffer discrimination in some areas of life. These gender prejudices also make a dent in women with great intellectual capacity, not only in the labor field with phenomena such as the glass ceiling but also in social and sentimental relationships, where it seems that being intelligent is perceived as something, to the practice, undesirable.
Is it essential to have a partner to be happy?
We live in a society that requires us to have an orderly life: stable employment, formal couple and, at a certain age, children and form a family and a home. It is an approach that we must question . For some people, this model of life can be totally according to their expectations and illusions, and this is fully respectable. But our generation still continues to accept some traditions and cultural impositions.
Some women, prisoners of this moral context, they are constantly looking for men who appreciate them and with whom they share their lives . In the Spanish faculties, women are already the majority. This means, among other things, that in the future it is quite likely that there are more women who choose to have a partner with a lower academic qualification than them. We are facing a new confused social reality: while there are more women who can develop powerful academic and work careers, men are not yet ready to give up their position of intellectual hegemony within the couple, a fact that is causing that many 'intelligent' women remain single.
