The 10 basic communication skills

The communicative skills What we have determines the success of our interpersonal relationships, and, therefore, it is necessary to communicate well at work, with our friends, our family, and in general with all the people around us. Knowing and mastering basic communication skills brings many benefits, such as helping to resolve differences or promoting trust and mutual respect.

For example, it is essential to have good communication skills when we face a job interview or if we live as a couple, since coexistence is a constant negotiation. Although communicating seems simple, much of what we communicate is misunderstood or not well understood. Of course, this can cause conflicts in both our professional and personal relationships.

Communication skills and their relationship with emotional balance

Learning to communicate effectively is a skill that should be part of the school curriculum. Being a competent communicator can make a difference in personal relationships, in the success of your professional career and, in addition, in your self-esteem and self-confidence, because it is part of the basic social skills.

The relationship between emotional balance and communication skills has been demonstrated in many researches, and, in fact, their training is a therapeutic technique that is used in psychologists' consultations because it provides benefits for the patient's well-being.

The 10 basic communication skills

If something characterizes the happiest people is that they have communication skills that help them to face more satisfactorily the different situations that arise in their day to day. Do not be discouraged if you have difficulty communicating because nobody is born expert . Communication, like other skills, can be learned and practiced.

So read on to find out what basic communication skills are.

1. Active listening

Knowing how to listen is a basic communication skill, but, although it seems simple, not everyone has this ability . Many times we only hear instead of listening, and sometimes we listen to ourselves instead of listening to the other with a correct attitude. The active listening, as the name suggests, means to listen actively, that is, with full attention. In other words, you have to pay attention with the five senses. Active listening refers to attending not only to what the person says, but also to the feelings, ideas or thoughts that the individual expresses.

If you want to go deeper into this topic, you can take a look at our article: "Active listening: the key to communicating with others"

2. Empathy

In effective communication, empathy is important to take the place of the other. In fact, empathy is one of the most important social skills, because it is necessary to coexist with others. Even if you do not totally agree with a co-worker, with an employee or with a friend, It is necessary to understand your point of view, because you also have your needs . In addition, putting yourself in the place of the other helps you when sending a clearer and more effective message.

3. Emotional validation

But in addition to the two previous points, one must take into account emotional validation, that is, acceptance and feedback to communicate better. Because when we have others before us, it is necessary to listen without judging and it is an indispensable requirement to communicate to the other person that has been understood.

Emotional validation improves communication since the other interlocutor feels recognized and understood , and thus increases the verbalization of what you think. Emotional validation has a positive effect because it creates an environment of trust. Telling the other person that you have understood him, showing him that you have been listening to him, and making it clear that you respect his opinion is enough to create a conducive communication environment.

4. Non-verbal language

Body posture, eye contact or gestures, that is, non-verbal language (or non-verbal communication) also communicate. Being relaxed and transmitting what we are trying to say can maximize the message we want to send to others. A study carried out by Albert Mehrabian states that in a face-to-face conversation, the verbal component is 35% and more than 65% is non-verbal communication . In the words of Mehrabian himself: "The verbal component is used to communicate information and the non-verbal component to communicate personal states and attitudes".

5. Conflict resolution and negotiation

Conflict is inevitable in any relationship, and learning to manage and negotiate is a healthy and essential way to make relationships work . Some individuals prefer not to face conflicts to avoid the discomfort they can generate. This only causes resentments and misunderstandings.

The ability to resolve conflicts efficiently requires a calm, non-defensive and respectful performance. When you control your own emotions, you can communicate your own opinions without threatening or attacking others.

6. Verbal language

One of the basic elements of a good communicator is how it sounds in front of others. Speaking too softly or loudly, dragging words, or using too much filler term such as "ah", "eh" or "um", can cause the message and the connection to the speaker to be lost.

So, it is necessary to be clear, to use concrete examples, to have a good capacity for improvisation, to vocalize correctly, to consider the times , and ultimately express correctly what we have in mind to connect with our interlocutor.

7. Reading and writing

Reading and writing are important to communicate . Reading enables intellectual development and, as a cognitive function, allows access to technological, scientific and information advances. Therefore, it helps to better understand reality, and being habitual readers gives us the necessary tools to be able to dialogue critically.

Regarding writing, we do not always have to communicate orally, but it is important to have a good command of written communication. At present, new information and communication technologies (ICT) have burst in our lives. Writing a cover letter to seduce a recruiter if we want a job or send an email to a company to complain about your service requires this skill.

8. Respect

People are more open to communicate if we show respect towards them and their ideas . Simple actions such as using your name or tutoring, having eye contact that indicates sincerity, and reflecting active listening makes the other person feel respected and taken into consideration. In a couple relationship, for example, a nice gesture or sign of affection can almost instantly stop a tense and negative situation and return the relationship to a good channel for positive and affective communication.

9. Persuasion

Persuasion is a key communication tool, especially in the business world, because it transforms ideas, beliefs, attitudes and behaviors, and tries to satisfy the needs of both parties. It usually has a bad reputation, because, in the wrong way, it can be confused with manipulation (doing something against your interests). Persuasion is the foundation of any successful negotiation .

10. Credibility

If we think about the previous point, It is impossible to persuade a hearing if we do not demonstrate credibility and authority . Credibility generates trust, and, as with respect, trust is a great ally of communication. People are more receptive when there is trust. Therefore, it is necessary that you be consistent with what you say and what you do. For example, that there is harmony between your verbal and non-verbal communication.