How to eliminate negative emotions from our mind
If you think guilt or worry has a positive contribution in your life, it means that you have a distorted perception of reality.
Emotions such as guilt and worry are becoming more frequent in today's society. It is increasingly common to observe stressed people who "sink into a glass of water" , for situations that perhaps, in the prism of others, are not so serious.
What are negative emotions?
The destructive power of negative emotions is mainly due to the influence they exerted in our childhood. We learned from childhood, during the development of our first and second childhood, that if we did not feel bad for some mistake or not worry enough about the future we would not be able to correct some attitude or solve a problem.
Since we were kids they taught us this type of negative emotions in order to instruct our behavior and correct certain types of behavior . This problem is expressed mainly in our stage of maturity, since both guilt and worry can be really harmful emotions for our emotional well-being, exposing us to manipulations and falling into self-punishing behaviors.
Why guilt and worry are negative emotions
The problem of guilt and worry lies mainly in the fact that we waste all our present moments punishing ourselves for things that have already happened or that we want to happen in the future. Because of this kind of negative thinking, our ability to enjoy and connection with life is severely diminished.
Although both emotions have a theoretical purpose to help us correct behaviors or to look for possible solutions to problems, both also serve a futile purpose in our lives, since they only manage to keep us immobilized in the face of adversity. This type of "immobilization" can be observed both in guilt behaviors and in feelings of anxiety or fear of a possible event.Guilt can serve as retribution in itself and permission to repeat the same behavior -Osho
A society that brings us to constant concern
Today's society is full of people who feel bad about something they should not have done, or are stressed by things that might happen.
With guilt on their backs, they feel overwhelmed by some attitude from the past. while with worry they are anxious about things that have not yet happened and that, to make matters worse, are likely to never happen.
Most likely, you, dear reader, find yourself in this same situation on some occasions . If you feel frequently trapped by one of these emotions, you need to work with them to start building the future, leaving these negative and paralyzing emotions aside.
How to eliminate the feeling of guilt
Starting to see the past as something that can not be changed, no matter how you feel about it, is fundamental to eliminating this type of negative emotions. You can use phrases like: "My feeling of guilt is not going to change or improve anything that happened" since no feeling that involves punishing you can make a positive change in your attitude or in your current life.
If you want a significant change in the way you respond to the guilt manipulations of your thinking, start by incorporating the following guilt-free strategies into your life .
1. Accept your behavior without punishing yourself for it
Live fully the present moment and then look for some constructive solution. Choosing to feel guilty and self-punish for what happened will not solve anything or ensure that your behavior will change. In the best case, you will get a "patch" solution that will soon vanish.
2. Set aside appropriate moments to deal with your affairs and obligations
Ask yourself what it is that you have been avoiding , reflect on whether your feeling of guilt is produced by avoiding a situation or some responsibility, and take care of it!
3. Enforce your position of not self-punishing
If some individual has a position contrary to yours and tries to manipulate you through guilt, Start by respecting your position of not opting for useless feelings that imply self-punishment and think constructively about whether your attitude has a purpose or is only hurting you.
4. Begin by accepting things in yourself that may not please others
Remember that it is impossible to satisfy everyone , your behavior does not have to be classified as bad or good according to the opinion of the rest. Set your happiness and harmony as a priority before external acceptance.
5.Take note of all the situations that make you feel guilty
You can write down the why, the when and the who of the situation , to then analyze and determine if you really have to make some change in your attitude.
How to eliminate worry
To eliminate worry, start by changing your perception about the future . Stop perceiving it as something that you should be aware of all the time, so you will get away from the obsessive thoughts that only bring you anxiety and fear.
You can use phrases like: "Only what you do in the present can determine my future." If you apply this maxim, you will see that it is absurd to worry about things that have not yet happened, especially if they deprive us of living in the present moment.
Allow yourself to employ the following strategies to free yourself from your feelings of worry and begin to take care of your life.
- Start by taking care of the problem When you feel the need to worry about a situation: the best antidote to cure worry is action.
- Recognize how incoherent it is to worry about things that have not happened yet , ask yourself frequently the question: Will something change the fact that you are worried? In spite of what may happen, can I continue to do valuable things for myself and others?
- Allow yourself shorter and shorter periods to feel worried : we can start doing three sessions of 10 minutes a day to feel worried. It should be remembered that we must do everything possible to feel concern only at the set times.
- Make a list of all the concerns of yesterday, last week or the previous year r : You can check this list to convince yourself that your worries were not so serious many times, because despite everything, you are still alive today. Observe how in each situation it was the occupation that managed to build a solution, while the concern had no positive effect.
Why did they teach us these negative emotions?
The main reason why we were taught negative emotions such as guilt or worry is due in large part to our cultural values, since It is considered as something "inappropriate" not feel bad and not punished for our problems .
All this cultural legacy is related to the importance we give to our problems, since our culture is taught that if we really care about a person or a specific issue, we must show our interest by feeling guilty for a "bad" attitude that We have had, or exposed our concern to show our love.
It is as if we were taught that exposing our pain and emotional distress was a fundamental requirement to show affection and importance to others.