Emotions: friends or enemies?
Human beings are rational animals, but we have focused so much on the logical aspects of ourselves that it often seems that we forget or we forget that we are also emotional beings. We can think, we can analyze the events of our life, make decisions, create, reflect, but also and above all we feel.
Somehow, our emotions are present at all times in our life . When we fall in love, we feel something for another person; but also when we smell fresh bread we can notice different nuances in a very vivid way or even feel different. Similarly, when we are with friends enjoying a good conversation; or just sitting on the sofa at home with a blanket when it was cold or raining outside on the street. We feel love, nostalgia, satisfaction, comfort, relaxation, comfort ...
We love being able to feel this kind of things, they make us value life, enjoy small and big moments, feel present in the here and now and value things. But we do not usually take into account the emotions that are often considered "negative"; just to try to avoid them.
- Related article: "Emotional psychology: main theories of emotion"
The management of negative emotions
Nobody likes being scared, or sad, or stressed, sad, downhearted. Feeling embarrassment, guilt or remorse for something. But, even if we do not like to feel that way, we could not feel the pleasant emotions if we are not able to accept also the negative ones .
For example, when we love someone, it is also normal to feel afraid of losing that person, and of course very normal to be terribly sad if that person disappears from our life. The price of being able to feel the wonderful emotion that is love, is to be willing to be able to suffer at some time.
But unfortunately, sometimes the fear of one's own painful emotions is so great that we spend our lives avoiding them, denying their existence and implying that we are actually more "strong" than we really are, when it is not It is a matter of strength to feel more or less sad about something, but of the ability to give more to a person or not.
In fact, there are people who fear their "negative" emotions so much that are unable to look for positive emotions . For example, it is what happens when someone prefers not to risk having a job that excites him but that demands a certain responsibility, for fear of failing. Or by not starting a relationship for fear of suffering. And so you could put many examples.
- Maybe it interests you: "Are we rational or emotional beings?"
Denying a part of one's life
The problem of acting in life avoiding feeling negative things is mainly that we move away from positive experiences. If I am not willing to risk anything, I can not receive anything or feel anything.
Is it worth living like that? Did we really manage to live like this? Sooner or later, however much we want to avoid it, we realize that our emotions are part of ourselves, and to fight against them is to fight against us. In some moments the rational part can win the battle , but in others the emotions that invade us will do it the more we try to get away from them.
The importance of reconciling with our emotional side
The good thing about all this is that if we stop fighting, if we are able to understand that there are no good or bad emotions, but that they are all good and adaptive according to the circumstances in which we find ourselves, we can stop running away from them, accept them, understand them and express them in a way consistent with our needs.
As sad as a person is, if he accepts his emotion and expresses it, time can heal his wounds. When instead of that it is forbidden to feel that pain and it is enclosed within oneself , it is not possible for time to cure anything, it only keeps it locked up with great effort and with the inconvenience that many times it then turns against us.
Knowing the usefulness of each of our emotions, and adding to the definition of ourselves the fact that we are rational and emotional animals, can help us to understand ourselves more, accept ourselves and be able to live both the good and the bad that happens to us in life. . After all, the bad is also learned.
