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How to support gay teens

How to support gay teens

January 21, 2023

Homosexuality continues to be a source of stigma in the great majority of the countries of the world, not to mention that it is in practically all. The beliefs based on tradition, which spread an essentialistic and unscientific view of what is human sexuality, makes for some people being homosexual implies going against nature (although that does not mean anything).

The effects of discrimination against sexual preferences that are outside of heterosexuality they are especially fed with gay teens , which are in the process of forming their own identity and are more vulnerable to attacks that undermine their personality and prevent them from expressing themselves as they are.


  • Maybe you're interested: "Why the idea that homosexuality is unnatural is absurd, in 5 reasons"

Tips to support gay teens

In the following lines we will see some guidelines to follow to help that homosexual teenagers in our environment feel accepted, supported and respected , in addition to ensuring that they are not afraid to show their tastes and preferences as any person would.

1. Learn the basics of gender and sexuality

This step is essential, as it will avoid confusion in dealing with these young people. The fact that for centuries it has been considered that "normal" is heterosexuality has made this is associated with many other things related to gender which have also been considered normal and socially desirable.


For example, there are those who understand that being homosexual is feeling of a gender that does not correspond to the one denoted by their genitals, or having attitudes and actions associated with those of the opposite sex to theirs.

Therefore, we must distinguish between biological sex, sexual orientation, gender identity, and gender roles. Gender identity consists of the gender to which one's own identity is associated (although there are also people who do not identify with any), and gender roles are the set of tasks, actions and behavior styles that have been socially assigned. to a genre.

2. Keep in mind that homosexuality is not something exotic

You can not treat a homosexual teenager as if it were a museum piece. That is, what behaviors like asking a lot of questions about their lifestyle and their sexual preferences. One thing is to worry because you feel comfortable, and another is to overwhelm you reminding him again and again of his orientation; In that context, it is normal for him to consider that there is something strange about him.


3. Help him understand that he is not to blame for the discrimination

Unfortunately, it is still normal for homosexual people to suffer psychological or even physical attacks because they are so. But the main harmful effect of this is not usually the acute discomfort generated by each attack, but the way in which these experiences can lead to thinking about oneself. The theory of the just world He explains that there is a tendency to think that in clear cases of suffering, it is likely that the victim has done something to deserve it, and this also applies to self-concept.

Thus, in the face of continued attacks, the idea that if there is so much hatred must be for a legitimate reason, it gains strength, and this not only undermines self-esteem, but leads to confusion about what is and what is must do to deserve to live in peace.

  • Maybe you're interested: "Fair World Theory: do we have what we deserve?"

4. Listen to your real concerns

Each case is unique, so you have to know how to adapt to the person you are dealing with. In the case of young homosexuals, it is easy that stereotypes make us take for granted things that really are not .

Therefore, we must listen carefully to what they explain about themselves, without letting our beliefs and schemes deform the content of their message. Only in this way will be known how to give support to gay teenagers correctly and without falling into simplicity.

5. Promote their integration in groups, but do not force them

In adolescence it is very important to feel accepted by a group. Unfortunately, young people of the new generations do not have to be more respectful than adults with a diversity of sexual orientations. In fact, in the case of males, there is a toxic masculinity that makes mistreatment frequent who gets out of the prototype of tough, violent and, of course, heterosexual man.

That is why it is good to help these young people with greater possibilities of being excluded find a group in which to integrate well. However, you have to be respectful of your preferences and interests, and not push to have them enter a specific group if they do not want to.

6. Show references beyond heterosexuality

It is very positive that adolescents find references that inspire them to develop their personality. In this sense, knowing someone who is homosexual and shows positive or even admirable values ​​is beneficial because it shows that this sexual orientation does not have to be a reason to be ashamed.


Gay teen records family's intervention (January 2023).


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