11 traits of people with high emotional intelligence
In a way, our lives are formed by habits and routines.
What we do defines what we are, and to a certain extent, if we change our way of living day to day we are also changing ourselves. Our habits have transforming power, and this can also be applicable to emotional intelligence.
In fact, the idea itself of what is emotional intelligence suggests that it can be trained through routines. If emotional intelligence is, in short, our ability to manage emotions successfully , and we make the way in which these emotions appear vary, we will also be transforming in something else the challenge that confronts them.
11 habits of people with good emotional intelligence
Next I present 11 habits that characterize people with high intelligence . Taking into account this list of characteristics can help us to know to what extent we are near or far from this "ideal" of emotionally intelligent person and also to try new strategies to develop this type of intelligence.
Of course, it is a collection of characteristics that serve as guidance, not as an absolute criterion to differentiate people with high emotional intelligence and clearly distinguish them from those who are not. Intelligence is a gray scale, not two categories clearly separated from each other .
1. They learn to express their feelings clearly
The people with a high emotional intelligence They know that managing their own emotions does not mean repressing them . However, they also know that when you are in the company of other people, you have to take into account the way in which they interpret what we express. Balance is the key in interactions.
Because, They try to find ways to honestly reveal their emotional state , without generating contradictory messages. This requires training in the way they self-examine their emotions, which brings us to the next point. We are talking about sincere and authentic people.
2. They are always listening to their own needs
Having good emotional intelligence means, among other things, be clear at all times that human needs go far beyond the physiological , such as food or drink, and include others of an emotional nature. That's why people with high emotional intelligence are accustomed to reflect on what they feel, and have the same amount of needs of this type than any other person.
Monitoring this dimension of psychology itself gives the possibility of improving when making a diagnosis about the possible emotional conflicts that can be generated in oneself.
3. They train to identify feelings well
Of little use monitoring the emotional state if you can not distinguish one type of emotion from another. That is why those people who stand out for having good emotional intelligence they strive to find the differences and similarities between those emotional nuances that they feel .
This can be done either by focusing on one's own emotions or those of others, or even by soaking in works of fiction in which the characters have complex personalities and a well-developed psychological dimension. In addition, it is necessary that they generate their own way of designating these emotions, using words that they know well.
4. They struggle to manage their attention well
People with high emotional intelligence keep in mind that in the world there are so many painful experiences with which, if we focus only on them, we would not raise our heads. However, they also know that something similar happens with happy experiences, so that if we only had the latter in our heads, we would live in a very stimulating reality, although very separate from reality.
That is why they try to direct attention according to criteria of utility for themselves , and do not fall into the trap of entering a loop of optimism or pessimism that traps your way of perceiving things. In other words, they govern their focus of attention so that they do not govern them.
5. Analyze the viability of their aspirations
Although in the capitalist society the fact of taking risks is rewarded without practically thinking about the consequences of failing, Emotionally intelligent people tend to decide which projects to pour their time into and their efforts depending on the possibilities of success expected, so as not to work on an unrealistic framework of expectations.
In this way, success or failure does not come to them so suddenly that they can not assimilate its impact.
6. They tend to avoid believing that others want to harm them
Emotionally intelligent people they do not have to be trusting , but at the same time they do not believe that the plans or the motivations of the others happen to harm them, as if this were in itself a sought objective. That's why you rarely take incidents as something personal.
7. Exercise self-criticism
Looking back and recognizing mistakes can be as useful as therapeutic, and that is why self-criticism is a resource highly valued by people with high emotional intelligence .
This will not only make it difficult for certain conflicts with other people to become entrenched, but it will also allow them to have a more realistic and detailed view of both their own capabilities and the aspirations and motivations that move them. This gives them better resources to overcome their fears and progress day by day.
8. They take time to learn what other people are like
Emotional intelligence It also consists of not going with prefabricated speeches about how different types of emotions are .
That is why to make use of this ability it is necessary that before you learn on the ground about how these emotions are and how they are expressed in each of the people that matter, to know how is the best way to relate to them.
9. Learn ways to become self-motivated
One of the best ways to learn to recognize one's own style of expressing emotions is experiment with what is motivating and what is not . In addition, the results of this learning process can be applied instantly.Recommended article: "60 motivating phrases to focus on success"
10. They spend time with the people they connect with best
People with high emotional intelligence they do not have to look for the company of people who look like them , but with those with which they fit best. However, from time to time they leave their comfort zone to open up to new friendships, which allows them to know more about themselves.
11. They are not afraid to meet new people
People with high emotional intelligence, despite being more or less extroverted, are able to open up to new experiences .
This also positively influences his social aspect. They are people who are not afraid to meet other people, although they may come from different worlds.Related article: "Guide to meet new people"