Mental control: 14 psychological tips to achieve it
It might seem that mind control has something to do with superpowers , something like telepathy or the ability to control the mind of others. But mind control refers to our ability to be aware of our thoughts and our emotions so that they do not dominate our behavior.
When we have a poor mental control we may regret some actions or behaviors that we carry out, for example, when we fight with our partner and tell him things that we do not really think, things that at a certain moment, when anger dominates us , may seem true. On the other hand, when we think coldly we can realize that emotions have dominated us.
- Related article: "Winner character: 9 qualities and traits to understand it"
How to improve mental control
Mental control is a set of techniques or habits that allow us to better know our emotions and thoughts and to know those of other people. As a result, it allows us to regulate our behavior.
In the following lines you can find a list of tips to improve mind control.
1. Connect with here and now
Mental control can only happen when we are in the present moment, that is, in the here and now , connected with ourselves and what surrounds us. If we live in unrealistic expectations or simply get carried away by our thoughts, we can carry out behaviors that we are not proud of afterwards.
Being in the present allows us to reflect on what is happening at this precise moment, which helps us to act according to the situation and what we want. We control what we do
2. Make use of self-reflection
Living in the present moment does not mean that we should let ourselves be carried away by the situation without thinking about anything other than feeling, but that it is possible to use self-reflection, which It is very important in the development of a person and that allows to learn from experience .
And it is that self-reflection is linked to observation and therefore to mental control. Reflecting and focusing on what happens not only around us but also in our internal experience helps us to have more mental control.
- You can deepen this topic in our article: "Personal Development: 5 reasons for self-reflection"
3. Work self-knowledge
When talking about mind control we are referring to emotional regulation and therefore behavior. And can not speak emotional regulation if there is not an understanding of our emotions before. That is why self-knowledge is necessary in order to control the mind and regulate our behavior .
- In our article "Self-knowledge: 8 tips to improve it" you can learn to improve this important capacity.
4. Improve your emotional intelligence
Self-knowledge is an important aspect of emotional intelligence, but This type of intelligence also includes other skills that help regulate our behavior For example, empathy and the ability to understand the emotions of others.
- To improve our mental control it is an interesting option to go to an emotional intelligence workshop such as those that appear in this list: "The 6 best courses of Emotional Intelligence and Personal Development"
5. Do not live on autopilot
In the time in which we live and because of how the mind works, we can live on autopilot, that is, we go around the world without paying attention to anything. Our thoughts jump from one place to another and we rarely stop to observe them or understand them.
We can get up in the morning, turn on the television and not even know what our breakfast tastes like. We can get in the shower and not even feel the water that comes out of it. For more mental control, it is necessary to stop living on autopilot and experience present experience with observation and mindfulness.
6. Be aware
And this is achieved by being aware of our experience, whether external or internal . The key is often the willingness to want to be conscious. For example, we can be talking to someone and be thinking about what we are going to say even before the other person finishes speaking, or we can observe the other interlocutor attentively not only as to what he / she verbalizes, but also to what his nonverbal language tells us.
Being aware helps us control our mind. In this sense, controlling the mind is an act of will.
Many people have the belief that meditation is simply a relaxation technique, in which one only needs to put oneself in the position of the meditator and our mind will go blank.
But meditation, although it is true that it quiets the mind and relaxes us, allows us to observe our thoughts or our experiences (even unpleasant, as in the case of TongLen meditation) and accept the experience. This makes us much more balanced and helps us improve our mental control capacity.
8. Practice Mindfulness
Although some people think that Mindfulness is a type of meditation, it is not exactly like that. Yes, it is true that Mindfulness includes meditation in its practice, but it also includes other techniques that help to develop attention, compassion, the ability to be in the present moment, the non-judgmental mentality and other characteristic principles of Mindfulness .
As the psychologist says Jonathan García-Allen In our article "Mindfulness: 8 benefits of mindfulness", "Mindfulness proposes to find the essence of what we are. It is not simply a method to improve well-being, but it can become a philosophy of life that helps us to relate better and more adaptively to ourselves and what surrounds us (people, events, situations, etc.) " .
9. When you see that you lose control ... stop for 1 minute!
A technique that can be very useful in many situations and that requires only a minute to practice it is meditation in a minute. This technique is ideal, for example, when we are in the office and we feel saturated , or when we want to take perspective of a situation that is affecting us (a fight with a partner, for example).
Below you can find a video that explains how to perform this exercise:
10. Develop yourself and avoid feeling frustrated
People who are happier with what they do in their lives and feel fulfilled are more likely to relate better to other people, since they feel good about themselves and are not frustrated by who they are .
Frustration generates conflicts with other people, because we can project our failures into these, and we can even turn other individuals into our scapegoat. Being good with oneself helps to see the future clear and follow the same line without deviating.
11. Get out of the comfort zone
It is also good to stimulate our mind to leave the comfort zone to learn new things and be more aware of other situations that may go unnoticed when we always do the same.
12. Do new activities
And this includes doing new activities and discovering new tasks that we are not used to . By doing this we put aside the automatisms and therefore mobilize all our attention and our resources, we become more present and more aware.
13. Have a life plan
To enjoy greater emotional health too it is necessary to have a plan of life, because the objectives help us to continue on the path we want and we will suffer less for some temptations that may appear in our path.
In addition, other goals can also help us maintain mental control. For example, if we practice physical exercise and follow a diet because we want to achieve a slender body. Research shows that having clear, realistic and motivating goals also helps to prevent depression.
14. Reduce stress
The mind and the body are connected and, therefore, stress can cause many problems in our body as in our behaviors or thoughts. It is difficult to think clearly when we are stressed, especially if we feel burned.
Sadness or anxiety can take hold of us, and our concentration and also our mental control suffer it. In times of stress, for example, people are unable to control their eating habits. For greater mental control, it is good to enjoy greater well-being.