Emotional management: 10 keys to master your emotions
Emotional management or emotion management refers to being aware of the emotions we feel, accepting them and regulating them if necessary.
Unfortunately, we live in a society that considers irrational emotions and are practically enemies of reason . But the truth is that emotions are part of us and have an important adaptive function. So you have to learn to accept them and take them with you as best as possible.
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Emotional management and emotional intelligence
In recent years, the concept of emotional management has been gaining ground with the rise of emotional intelligence, a construct that has generated much interest among psychologists for its benefits for the psychological health of people and the performance of these in different areas , such as labor, sports or academics.
The correct management of emotions determines to a greater or lesser extent success in different areas of our lives, such as interpersonal relationships or work.
What is emotional intelligence
Emotional intelligence is a concept popularized by Daniel Goleman, a well-known American psychologist, who made emotional intelligence known all over the world thanks to his best-seller: Emotional Intelligence (1995).
In fact, but, the idea of emotional intelligence already appeared in the literature thanks to other authors, and derives from Howard Gardner's theory of multiple intelligences. Gardner, after his research, concluded that there are different types of intelligences, including intrapersonal intelligences and interpersonal intelligence. Both are part of emotional intelligence.
- Maybe you're interested: "5 tips to nurture your child with emotional intelligence"
Research has confirmed that emotional intelligence helps
- Improve the knowledge of oneself and one's emotions
- Make better decisions
- Improve work performance and productivity
- Reduce and protect against stress, anxiety and depression
- Encourage interpersonal relationships and empathy
- Improve personal development
- Improve the capacity for influence and leadership
- Promote psychological well-being
- Increase motivation and help achieve goals
- Sleep better
Strategies to master emotions
Emotional intelligence is a process that includes both one's own emotional knowledge and the emotions of others and the regulation of one's own emotions.
But how do we achieve this? Then we propose you ten strategies so that you can achieve it .
1. Keep a diary of emotions and become aware of these
The diary of emotions is an excellent tool to know your own emotions and know the effect they have on your behavior. There are different ways to do it but here we propose one. You just have to follow these steps.
- Grab a notebook and aim for the day
- Take 20 minutes before going to bed to take stock of your day
- Record those emotions that have arisen
- Write down how you have felt and how this emotion has affected your behavior
Emotional self-knowledge is the beginning of the correct management of emotions. Without knowing what we feel and how they affect us we can not regulate our emotions.
2. Accept yourself as you are
That personal discovery may reveal aspects of your life that you do not like or that you find hard to see as positive. But you must accept yourself as you are. Emotions are normal and we all feel them. We can all make mistakes because it is part of life .
3. Focus on positive thoughts and control negative ones
Negative emotions cause great discomfort, so we tend to avoid them . But the solution is not to look the other way and make people see that they do not exist. If you have already done a job of detecting the emotions you feel, analyze them and let them pass. Focus on the positive and negative emotions give them the value that touches them, but do not dwell on them. Now it's time to repeat to you how much you love yourself and how much you will strive to achieve the love of your life: yourself.
4. Have a positive attitude
And is that to achieve this you must do your part . In emotional management there is a component that, in many cases, we ignore: it is the will. To master the emotions we must do our part and we must have a positive attitude because it is not always easy to master the emotions.
5. Retire on time
But obviously the positive attitude is only a part of emotional management . Emotions usually occur because an external stimulus triggers them.If you pretend to specialize in the art of emotional intelligence, you will realize that, sometimes, the best alternative is not to stay in the conflict zone and make the decision to retire on time. For example, if someone is provoking you. In these cases, turning around and leaving is an emotionally intelligent decision.
6. Learn to fit the criticism
Maybe what is making you feel bad is not knowing how to fit the criticism and being too aware of what others think of you. That is a bad option, because Emotional well-being is born within oneself , of your own interpretation of the world. Learning to fit the criticism is necessary to be an emotionally balanced person.
- Related article: "10 tips to better fit the criticism"
7. Release tension with sport
If you want to be calmer you can release tensions thanks to physical exercise . In fact, practicing sport is one of the healthiest alternatives not only physically, but also psychological. Physical exercise helps you, for example, to reduce stress or increase your self-esteem.
- If you want to know more about the benefits of practicing physical activity, you can read our post: "The 10 psychological benefits of practicing physical exercise"
8. Attend an emotional management workshop
One of the best ways to become an emotionally intelligent person is through training . There are many courses and workshops that will help you manage your emotions. They tend to be experiential type workshops with many participatory dynamics, so that emotional learning will be entertaining.
9. Practice active listening
If you want to better understand the emotions of others you can practice active listening . Many times we hear and do not listen, because we are more aware of what we are going to say than of what the other person tells us with both verbal and non-verbal language. Active listening is listening in its entirety, since verbal language is approximately 30% of what we communicate. The rest is non-verbal language.
10. Practice Mindfulness
One of the most useful strategies to better manage emotions is Mindfulness or mindfulness. Mindfulness is actually a philosophy, but nowadays different techniques are used to put it into practice. Mindfulness is simple, because it only requires adopting a way of evaluating events, characterized, for example, by self-pity, attention in the present moment or the non-judgmental mentality. However, even if it is simple, its practice requires will and effort, so it is not easy and must be worked on.
