8 types of single: what kinds of single people are there?
Sometimes it is the way in which we relate to others, and not so much our way of thinking, which defines in a more special way who we are and how we act.
We can explain our motivations, our goals and part of our problems and concerns by looking at how our personality is expressed when we are accompanied by more people.
And, in those occasions in which the emotional aspect is added to the social aspect, it is much more likely that we will approach a deeper and more complex description of our personality (or the personality of others). So if part of our way of being is expressed through the way we behave when we are in a relationship, the same happens in the absence of it, and more specifically when we are single .
What types of bachelor are there?
Then you can see a proposal of how could be a classification system of the main types of single .
It is not an exhaustive classification, and therefore the same person can present some characteristics of more than one of these types, but it is a first step that can help explain the traits, propensities and possible problems of people.
1. Independent singles
This type of single is promoted by an assessment of the costs and benefits of having a partner .
Singles of this type tend to value very much the option of living their own life without ties and with a lot of time available to them alone, without having to give time and space to another person. In other words, they are suspicious of too strong and intense commitments.
2. Self-sufficient singles
Single people who belong to this category do not even consider the costs and benefits of having a partner, because their life habits carry in themselves a high degree of isolation and self-sufficiency .
In this mode of singleness the default state is loneliness, although a solitude that does not have to be perceived as something negative, since it is interpreted as the normal state of things. Therefore, it is likely that these people remain unmarried for a long time, first because of their lonely habits and secondly because of their lack of interest in increasing their chances of becoming more connected with other people.
3. Isolated singles
Isolated single women show many characteristics that define the self-sufficient, but with the difference that they do perceive their singleness as a problem and therefore they would prefer to break with their isolation dynamics.
However, the very fact of being accustomed to a solitary way of life makes it difficult for them to learn other habits that expose them more to their relationships with others, and it is also possible that due to their lack of habit they find it difficult to learn some useful social skills. to form and maintain ties.
4. Low self-esteem
These people want to get to form a relationship, but they believe that they can not because of their habits or their habits, but because they believe that they, by their own way of being, are not worth enough to get to have these opportunities. That is, regardless of what they can learn or how they can change, they believe that they will never evolve enough to be attractive .
Of course, there is no objective criterion to determine the value that people have, and therefore these types of thoughts are deeply irrational, but that does not change the fact that they tend to be very persistent and affect many of the aspects of quality of one's life. Therefore, this mode of singleness is one of the symptoms of a larger problem that, in any case, will most likely be corrected by working on an improvement in self-esteem.
5. Existential bachelors
Singles belonging to this group are characterized by a certain existential pessimism , which means that they do not believe that partner relationships mean anything by themselves.
Therefore, they see in a cold and dispassionate way the option of getting to have intimate emotional relationships with someone, and although sometimes they can enjoy the couple's relationships, they will be aware that the pleasure they find in those moments is built by them with their own way of taking the relationship, and it is not given by the other person.
6. Ideological bachelors
This typology of singleness is less common, and is mainly explained by an ideology that causes the person to impose red lines when it comes to meeting people , or else systematically reject potential partners or people who are considered attractive. This way of thinking is not so related to one's own self-esteem as it is to the way in which reality and the functioning of society are interpreted.For example, people who profess certain religions in a very intense way can be very demanding with the times that they have to mark falling in love, or they can prohibit themselves the possibility of having a partner.
This mode of singleness can cause problems when both the ideological pressure and the desire to have a partner are very strong and produce a lot of pressure and anxiety.
7. Transitional singles
These people believe that their chances of being in a short or medium term relationship are relatively high , and therefore they are almost always examining the people around them to actively decide which ones are the best option. Therefore, they interpret the state of singleness as a transition from one relationship to another.
8. Bachelors for learning
Singles for learning are those who run away from the idea of having a partner as a result of past bad experiences .
This category could include both people who have developed a more or less elaborate discourse about why a couple does not suit them, and those who because of traumatic memories feel a strong irrational rejection and difficult to explain at the idea of being in a relationship. relationship of this type. Sometimes this aversion to finding a romantic partner is called philophobia.
Having a sentimental partner should not be an obligation
Our cultural heritage pushes us to mate and marry. It is necessary to divest ourselves of this idea and build our life based on personal values and our own criteria. During the last decade, new ways of loving (such as polyamory) have begun to gain prominence.
Of course, it is not necessary to live as a couple in order to be happy. Each individual must find his place in the world, his circle of friends and relationships, freely. Maybe in this way we can reinterpret the concept of singleness , so often associated with loneliness and isolation.