Does the physicist matter when it comes to flirting? 3 reflections on beauty

April 5, 2024

Before the end of the world we will stop asking this question: Does the physical matter to flirt?

It would be unconscious to say no , that the physicist does not matter at all and that handsome and ugly people link equally. You just have to look around to realize that they attract more the handsome than the ugly and are more successful at finding a partner.

Being attractive is more linked? Does the physical matter?

But, What is being handsome and what is being ugly? The answer may vary depending on who responds. Feúra and guapura, many times, are very subjective concepts. We can say that such a person is beautiful or that such a person is ugly. But if we focus on what makes them ugly or what makes them beautiful, things change; It will be more difficult to answer. The same could happen if a group of friends were shown a picture of a boy and asked if they consider him ugly or handsome. Surely a small debate about tastes, opinions and preferences is created.

I recommend you stop along the way to read this post: "11 things you should never do to try to seduce"

Next, we will expose three reflections about ugliness and beauty that will help you think differently and observe beauty from three different perspectives. Possibly, when you finish reading this article, you are starting to raise your self-esteem.

1. Go outside and watch

Let's go for a walk and feel the sun and fresh air on our faces. Let's walk carefully watching the people on the street. Surely we see people of all kinds of gender, race, age and class. Let's look at each of them and try to determine if they are handsome or ugly. Let's compare them, first, among them. Let's observe his eyes, his mouths, his body ... Let's walk like judges in a beauty championship.

Then, let's change the subject of comparison to ourselves. Contrastémonos with the rest of the people. It may be easier for us to decide if we use our filter selfconcept . According to our self-esteem, there will be more people in the sack of the handsome than in the sack of the ugly and vice versa. Finally, before returning home, let's compare the people who pass through the street with the beauty standards that film and advertising has implanted in us; let's compare all the guys with Brad Pitt . The thing changes, right? Surely the sack of the ugly is overflowing.

2. We reinterpret genetics

In The journey to love, Eduard Punset He explained very well what love is and attraction mechanisms . In his book, he explained one thing that everyone knows: we are attracted to people and, consequently, we see more beautiful individuals with better genetics.

According to this theory, the people with the best physics are the ones who tie the most . Therefore, people with better genetics are the ones that bind the most. But what is genetic and what is not? We are accustomed to understand that genetic traits are palpable and observable characteristics: color of the eyes, muscles, height, hair, teeth ... but is not the personality observable?

Perhaps, according to their acts and their way of being, do we not observe the behavior of the people? Is not intelligence also genetic, cognitive skills or humor? Just as we go to the gym to take advantage of our bodies, can not we train the personality to make it more attractive? How many times have we heard in the mouth of a girl "that guy was very good until he opened his mouth"?

3. Darwin could explain a few things to us

Let's remember and remember our school stage. Who managed to link more, at that time? The stages of socialization and learning mark us for life and it is in adolescence that we forge many of our beliefs regarding beauty. If we become evolutionists and remember what they told us about Darwin in school, we can understand why the hooligans always joined, the boys who excelled in some sport or the boys who were simply handsome because they had beautiful eyes and beautiful hair.

In regard to why the 'hard guys' link more, I think it is essential to read the article "Why do women prefer hard guys?" of psychologist Bertrand Regader, in which he explains the personality profile 'Dark triad' that attracts women so much.

The bad guy attracts, but it's a downward trend ...

According to evolutionists, girls are attracted to males that can protect them and give better offspring. Although this theory is very debatable, it does have some truth. If we stick to this hypothesis, we can come to understand why in high school they were always the ones who managed to flirt with the girls they liked.The girls had families that protected them and did not need anything else. They did not have to look at the smart guys. It was enough for them to look at the most handsome boys because their stability did not depend on them, at least the economic one. If we think about the previous reflection, for them beauty was reduced to something superficial and banal because their needs at that time were already covered on the other hand.

In summary, beauty is a subjective factor that has genetic roots , but that we can work, either physically or intellectually. The canons of beauty are references that we must take into account but, outside of the television, there is a real life in which we must live happily. Let us not let the learning and beliefs that we generate in the past torment us and learn to understand the world in a new way that protects and improves our self-esteem and our self-concept.

More tips to be more attractive (even if you think you're not)

We recently published a post that can make you assess the subject of physical attractiveness from another perspective. In addition to everything that we have already exposed, you must take into account that There are some keys to attract other people . The experience and polish some details can make us much more attractive when it comes to finding someone to share special moments with.